Think retainers are just for fancy folks like the legal counsel of large corporations? Well, I think if you have a wobbler or toddler at home that they’re for YOU.
Find a caring person you can trust and schedule a regular date-night. I know one family that pays their evening sitter a set amount each month and then plans enough dates to burn through the hours. That’s what I’m talking about!
Truth be told, I think the cost of a babysitter feels pretty freaking expensive when you think of what it used to cost to go see a movie and grab dinner. Or just to have a picnic and hike alone with your mate. And that’s not even factoring in a fancy dinner.
And it stings a little extra to write a check or fork over the $$ if I let myself think she may have spent the whole evening watching American Idol on TiVo while my two little angels slept peacefully… but that’s the wrong way to think about it.
The right way to think about it is to consider date-night and associated childcare a regular and essential part of each month. Budget for it like you do any other essential expense. And just hope it will save you on therapy later.
YES! I think this is a fabulous suggestion. Who knows, it probably will save us on therapy later — and in the meantime I didn’t have to pay $150 simply for the suggestion. Thanks Heather
I like your perspective on date night. My husband, our 28 month-old and myself live in my parents house along with my sister. This means we’re a bit crowded, and we have several babysitters on hand, often with little notice. I was thinking about the excitement while dating to see eachother everyday and wondered if married couples lose that. I’ve discovered that we’re blessed to see eachother everyday and that as the weeks go by we start needing real alone time. We get a date about once a month. It doesn’t seem like much but we also get family outtings together and those are fun too since we’re usually in a house of 6 total coming and going.
[...] friend Christine recently told me that she was inspired by my having a babysitter every single Friday night. She has a 4 year old and a newborn. She said that although they’re not going to go out every [...]
I think date nights WOULD HAVE saved us tons in therapy! Hoping its not too late to start now! I’m planning on hiring someone who is willing to do light food prep/laundry folding etc in addition to hanging out while my daughter sleeps!
Jen, that is the holy grail of babysitting. I hope you find it too!
[...] the economy totally sucking, we’ve modified our babysitter retainer model slightly and are trying to have a few more date nights at home. If you thought it was totally [...]
[...] have a sitter on retainer. Every Friday night she comes right after I have given the kids dinner. Her job is to give the kids [...]
[...] tip: If you are comfortable, go ahead and put your babysitter on retainer so you can have a regular date night out. You deserve a chance to enjoy yourselves without your [...]
[...] Ever since going on a date with my husband has carried an extra $15 per hour expense (that’s for the babysitter, for those of you who have just entered the world of parenthood), we’ve been looking for ways to squeeze dinner and a movie into as little time as possible. While we spend some of our date nights lingering over long dinners alone or with friends, a fair number are also spent at the theater. (We go out every week, as we have our babysitter on retainer.) [...]