We asked our Facebook community of 9000 moms to answer this: What piece of advice do you give to new moms?
There were so many responses that we have to break it up into several posts, and I thought this list of books and DVDs might be a good place to start.
Do you agree or disagree with these recommendations? Did any of these items help you? Did any of them make you feel terrible or confuse you?
What to read or watch when you need help with your new baby, in no particular order, according to our readers:
- The Baby Sleep Solution book by Suzy Giordano
- The Happiest Baby on the Block DVD
- Dunstan Baby Language DVDs will help you understand what your newborn wants.
- Itsy Bitsy Yoga has some poses that help calm babies and improve digestion. One mom says, “The Divine Drop was a lifesaver.” (Google it!)
- The Dr. Sears library of books
- Babywise
- Baby 411 book
- The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding book
- Secrets of the Baby Whisperer
I notice that no one mentioned Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, which was one of Heather and my most trusted sources. Is that book out of fashion?
I have heard that Babywise can lead to poor nutrition in babies b/c it advocates feeding on a rigid schedule and letting even the tiniest babies cry for a long period of time. Doesn’t sound like a very good book for new parents.
Babywise is terrible. The authors do not have degrees in anything to do with infants or development. Following a rigid schedule as they teach causes babies to be underfed and mom’s milk supply to dry up very early. Anecdotal evidence: All the people I know who have used it have not been able to breastfeed beyond 4 months.
Scientific evidence: This book has been tied to infant deaths and any and all actual experts on infant development, sleep and breastfeeding speak out against it strongly.
It is honestly an issue of dangerous teaching not just a difference of opinion like “I don’t want to sleep train.”
It completely goes against all research on fourth trimester, the importance of on demand feeding, and the importance of responding to a newborn’s cries.
Can you tell I feel really strongly about this one? I came home with a copy from the free book exchange one day and my husband said “What the hell?!” I said “I am putting it in the recycling bin. I didn’t want some unsuspecting parent to pick it up.”
Love the strong opinions, ladies! Keep ’em coming!
It’s unfortunate that Sara and Cara didn’t READ the book they trashed, before trashing it. Babywise doesn’t suggest rigid feeding schedules, simply a routine that can make the day easier for mom and for baby (sleep-eat-play-sleep, repeat). And it suggests that if your baby cries 30 minutes after a feeding, perhaps baby is not hungry, but rather tired. It promotes healthy sleeping for infants. It does say that if you are ever in doubt, the first rule is to FEED YOUR BABY. And, truthfully, I didn’t see any difference in Babywise and in The Baby Whisperer book. As well as with many of the suggestions in Healthy Sleep Habits (which I find dry and un-readable, although chok-full of good info). So why does Babywise get all the hate?
I read lots of books. I pull what I like from them, and what feels right. I mostly follow Babywise/Baby Whisperer principles. I breastfed my son for 13 months before I decided to stop. My baby girl is 6 months old and EBF. She just started solids – we’re using the Baby-led Weaning Method. There’s no “one book fits all” method, but I was thankful to have a Babywise routine to my day – I’d have lost my sanity without it.
Just say NO to BabyWise. Unwise and unsafe is more like it.
Yes… to healthy sleep habits…essential!
Hey @Alissa, I’m with you about the Healthy Sleep Habits book… I LOVE it but I also would love to edit it for easier usage.
I read so many of these, may I offer my input too? (Sure, I answer myself, what the hell?)
Happiest Baby on the Block, read the book and watched the DVD, the DVD is easier and faster. I refreshed myself with it when each new baby was born and asked my parents and in-laws to watch along.
Baby Whisperer, my fave. I really needed to read the EASY method even though it was so similar to what I had already read in…
Dunstan Baby Language, I bought it in a fit of desperation to understand the miniature screamy thing living with me. It helped me a bit. It has a very short window of usefulness in my opinion. But if you need it, you need it.
Babywise, too rigid to work for us because my babies all seemed to need/want to eat every 2 hours during the day.
I would have died without Happiest Baby on the Block DVD. Those 5 Ses were so vital with all my babies. I haven’t read any other the others.
But you are missing this vital book I just did a video on 😉
Definitely put Weisbluth on the list. The only sleep booki recommend!
The real problem with baby wise is that its doesn’t give you options if your baby doesn’t respond. Healthy sleep habits gives you a better base to deal with multiple sleep issues.
The AAP advised against Babywise…
http://aapnews.aappublications.org/content/14/4/21.abstract
Oh and I forgot – hands down the most useful book I have is The Wonder Weeks.
Absolutely agree with Alissa about Babywise. It suggests a schedule, and that OF COURSE you feed your baby. This book was a godsend. And by the way, my Babywise baby has consistently been at or above the 85th percentile in weight, and at or above the 60th percentile in height, so no failure to thrive here.
You didn’t mention any of the dr sears books. I loved them personally. Parents interested in Attachment Prenting should definitely read those. And yes, Babywise is awful. I’ve read it.
I have one more to add. I read and relied on the Nursing Mother’s Companion.
Jen! Love your input on the Guide to Baby Sleep Positions for co-sleeping parents; we’ll be covering it soon.
I haven’t really read many of these… if I read too much, I get overloaded and second guess everything. 🙂 That being said, early in parenthood, I found Baby 411 and LOVED it. I love the layout. I love the language used (simple to understand, some humor). I love that they look at many different methods and give their opinions (one author is a doctor). It just felt “right” to me (and my husband).
Thinking back (my son is 14 months old now), I was so overwhelmed as a new, first time mom that I only used a few sources. Now, having been through it once, I know what areas I’d like to be more prepared on. I read the “Happiest Baby” book specific to sleep when my son was close to 5 or 6 months old, and by then, I feel like most of the information was too late for us. I have “Itsy Bitsy Yoga” and may use it for the next baby… in a few years. 🙂
@heather! Thanks! I am glad you like it!
For the record, I have read babywise more than once. I have a degree in child development and have done much research on the book and on the couple who wrote it. Would you want to trust a parenting book written by people who have no related degrees and whose adult children have actively estranged themselves from their parents and that the American Academy of Pediatrics has made a statement against? Not the book I would trust personally.
I read the Baby Wise Book and The womanly Art of Breast Feeding. Of the 2 books, The Womanly Art is a fave. I did try some of the technique from Baby Wise and, like some woman, it didn’t all work for my baby. Mostly the timing. He was and is always hungry. The part I do like and still try and do most days (when my husband watches him while I’m at work it doesn’t always happen) is the sleep eat wake play pattern. This type of routine helped my baby sleep better at night and nap better too. However, he is 4 months and still only sleeps for 3 hour stretches, that’s better than the 1 hour stretches before.
Although the book talks of a strict schedule, it is not for every baby and to say that the book is “responsible” for infant deaths is quite far fetched. Take from it what you want and what works, discard what doesn’t.
The womanly art book is my bible and I give it as a gift to all new moms that plan to ebf. I go to it for everything. I had a hard time with breast feeding for the first 3 months but this book kept me from giving up.