Call it a Mom’s Group, call it a playgroup, call it whatever you like, but be sure that you’re clear on the objective: connecting with other mothers who you are going to enjoy.
If Gymboree is not fun for you, don’t go!
It is extremely helpful to have a circle of moms who you know in real-life who are also sleep training, breastfeeding, toilet training, or working full-time when you are so that you can compare notes, share resources, swap toys, and support each other. So while we encourage you to join a group of some kind, it is also important to give yourself permission to try a different one or a different solution.
Some moms have told me that the mom’s group they joined made them feel bad. Not ok. Quit, and look for a different option, alright?
But do not believe for one second that your 10-month old simply must socialize with other babies on a weekly basis or you are failing him.
you mean it’s ok if I don’t enjoy holding hands with grown-ups I’ve never met and singing folk songs? i’m having disturbing flashbacks…
Ah, Susie. I should have positioned this more as an open thread for moms to share their playgroup disappointments or nightmares. Kumbaya.
Whitney-you are right on the money with this one. I’m long past the baby stage but I recall vividly how hard it can be to make real connections with other new moms. This is such good advice; the friends we spend time with ought to be supportive friends. They’ll come in very handy when your babies are teenagers.
What do you think the right age is to join a play group? I can’t imagine my almost 4 month old getting anything out of it at this point.
Sara, the playgroup is for YOU so the question is will YOU get something out of it? I joined a new mom’s group when my first was about 4 weeks old and again when my second was about 8 days old. I needed the camaraderie.
this post is perfect, yes the playgroup is for YOU. And chances are, if you get along with the moms your kids will just naturally get along. And definitely leave if they make you feel bad, for me it was when I met a mom for the first time and she said “you work?! I could NEVER leave my baby with someone else all day, he needs me!” Umm.. yah, there’s no good way to respond to that other than “nice meeting you, bye!” and trust me that is NOT what was running through my head, AND if you can’t find a group that fits your needs, start one! That’s what I did and I’ve found a great group of supportive, like-minded mamas
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Hooray! Finally someone has given me permission to NOT join a playgroup!
[...] Whitney’s impassioned suggestion, I joined a new moms’ group and it was my lifeline for those first challenging months of motherhood. We met together for [...]