From the category archives:

Month 1-3

Activity #612: Write your momoirs

by Heather

Cori Howard, author of Between Interruptions: Thirty Women Tell the Truth About Motherhood wants to encourage us all to write down our “momoirs”.

To get started:

  1. Get a notebook and to keep it with them at all times. You never know when you might find a spare few minutes, or when and where your little angel might fall asleep. Having a notebook means you’re a mobile writer and all moms are mobile!
  2. Have faith in your own story. There’s a lot of writing on motherhood out there, but each of us has a unique perspective and a one-of-a-kind experience and almost all the moms I know, never tire of hearing new stories.
  3. If you get stuck and don’t know where to start, to just pick a topic: preschool, the dinner table, saying goodbye, faith. Those usually spark some amazing stories in my classes.

She also tells us:

In the crazy, overwhelming chaos of everyday life as a mother, there is so much to write about, and so little time. From memorializing your daughter’s sentences to your inner struggle with your post-baby identity, there are a millions stories you want to remember. The first thing I did upon becoming a mother (after the identity crisis, the ambition crisis and the marriage crisis sort of subsided) was write a book, an anthology about all this struggle (Between Interruptions: Thirty Women Tell the Truth About Motherhood).

After receiving dozens of emails from women wanting to know if there was a sequel and if I was interested in hearing their stories, I decided to start teaching “momoir” classes, helping women get their personal experience with motherhood into well-crafted words, whether it’s for themselves or to publish in a magazine or as a book.

If you want to learn more, or read some of the new stories written by Cori’s students, check out: TheMomoirProject.com. Canadians can find in-person classes in both Toronto and Vancouver too! Or grab her book, Between Interruptions: Thirty Women Tell the Truth About Motherhood.

Related activity: Track your new mama milestones

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Activity #50: Go on a reconnaissance mission

by Whitney

rm_shop.jpgWhen the baby is in a good mood (or better, sleeping!), scope out the “safe places” at your local shopping destinations where you can feed and change your baby. This will allow you to get out of the house every day and know that you don’t have to race against the clock to get back home. I like the children’s area of any bookstore. Find a quiet corner and a tiny chair, and pull out your boob or bottle.

Whitney-and-Heather-approved safe places in the Bay Area:

  • Nordstrom Women’s Lounge in SF, Walnut Creek and Palo Alto have places especially for feeding and changing. Plus lots of nice old ladies who can watch your stuff or even your baby while you use the bathroom.
  • 4th street: This Little Piggy has a chair where you can nurse (for the true newbie; you may not believe us now, but in another month, you’ll be out on the street where there are tons of public nursers. Once you’re comfy, you can join the party) The ladies in Benefit will probably let you use one of the waxing beds as a changing table. They may wear a ton of makeup, but they are actually mostly moms themselves.
  • Bay Street: My friend Sunny says she spent a large part of her maternity leave at California Pizza Kitchen. It is not crowded during the week and you can get a big booth where all your stuff can fit. Bay Street also has Barnes & Noble with a cafe area and a kids section.
  • Upper Shattuck: Waddle and Swaddle, a baby store, has an entire room for moms to nurse, drink water or tea (complimentary) and change their babies. You can stay as long as you like. The woman who runs it is a doula and can answer lots of questions for you. Elephant Pharmacy has chairs in the reading area.

By the end of month two, you’ll probably have your own favorite places. Come back and tell us what they are.

illustration by Amy Saidens

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Activity #574: Survive breastfeeding

by Whitney

This weekend, I’ll be gone two full days during most of Scarlett’s waking hours. I was really hoping not to pump during this time, thinking “Pumping is for people with newborns,” but Heather has made it clear that she doesn’t want me turning to her at 4 pm, in the middle of a great bloggity BlogHer discussion, saying, “If I don’t leave now, I’m going to leak, contract mastitis, and turn into a raging hormone monster.” So, I guess I’ll bring a pump.

I’m feeling a little embarassed about it though - like who has to hurry home to nurse their one-year old? Am I a sucker? Or maybe a hero?

Anyhow, let’s take a moment to give three cheers for me and my success at nursing both kids till their first birthdays and beyond. How Scarlett and I wind down this relationship is a mystery to me, (even though I’m not a rookie!). It doesn’t seem to be dwindling and the girl has no interest in drinking milk from a bottle or cup. She likes to use those things - for water - but doesn’t like the taste of milk. Stay tuned. This will surely resolve itself before kindergarten starts.

I want to encourage anyone who is reading, who’s in those first difficult weeks of nursing, or who is pregnant and assuming they’ll breastfeed, to read more. Read everything. Assume it will be difficult. Find friends who have done it. Go to a support group or a class. Other ideas from the veteran moms reading are welcome!

Note: I recently interviewed Andi Silverman, author of Mama Knows Breast for Glam.com. Read the interview here and subscribe to her website’s feed so that you can find the resources you need!

And I’ll tag this post “green”, cause really, isn’t breastfeeding about as green as it gets? No appliances required! Doesn’t waste water! Doesn’t create trash!

Best of luck to you new mamas. I’m rooting for you.

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Activity #92: Go to the theater where crying is allowed

by Whitney

Thank God for TiVo, but did you know some theaters also have special showings for new parents? These showings have different names in different cities, but the idea that yours will not (most likely) be the loudest baby in the theatre is the common thread.

Julian’s first movie as a newborn was Closer and Holden’s was Star Wars Episode III. Both kids were frequent attendees of Baby Brigade during their first year.

Select theaters are participating in a program called Baby Pictures. Check the website to see if there is a baby movie showing in a city near you.

The Kerasotes chain in Illinois and IndianaMatinee Movie Magic. I thought I was pretty magical when I watched Julia Roberts in Closer while doing my first in public breastfeeding (without crying!) when Julian was 5 weeks old. This mistakenly led Heather, my 19-weeks pregnant escort, to believe that nursing is easy.

Stroller matinees are a good early outing for freaked out new parents. Crying is totally allowed.

In LA, Monday Morning Mommy Movies weekly at 11:00 am (on Mondays, duh!) at the Grove, Beach Cities, Paseo, and Town Square. Thanks Portia!

In Portland, McMenamin’s Kennedy School hosts the occasional Mommy Matinee and for cheap!

Austin, TX has Baby Day Movie at Alamo Draft House Cinema (Tuesday and Friday). Parents are allowed to bring infants into the movie for shows starting before 2:05 pm. (check website for movie times and location).

For our local mommies:

In El Cerrito, El Cerrito Speakeasy’s Baby Brigade shows movies on Tuesday nights for babies under one year (and their parents!) along with a pizza and beer.

In Alameda, the Central Cinema also has a baby night for those under a year. We found out about it just after both babies were too old to go - darn!

In San Francisco, realtor Jill Russo sponsors a monthly Mommy Movie on the second Thursday of each and every month. And it’s FREE!

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