Comments on: I am not a stay-at-home mom. Do you think I am?

By: ashleigh

ashleigh — Sat, 03 Mar 2012 05:27:45 +0000

to echo the above comment, it has never occurred to me to be annoyed at another mom who works from home but calls herself a sahm…or any other combination of roles for that matter! every woman for herself, i say. i think that 98% of the time, moms are trying their darndest to do the very best they can for their kids, and to maintain a sense of self and sanity. so if that means, saying you’re a stay at home mom when you are on conference calls while your kids are at the park…whatev! that’s great! nobody would get snarky at me for reading a book while my kids play on the playground, why should i get snarky at someone for earning money when they can?

By: Emily

Emily — Fri, 02 Mar 2012 00:09:43 +0000

just to answer the question, ‘do SAHMs get annoyed when.. etc etc..?’ no. It never occurred to me to be annoyed at that. Do I feel annoyed now that you bring it up? Still no. Maybe a little jealous. Of you (for having a sense of self and probably accomplishment outside the home). Of myself (for not having other work to do during naptime – my quiet time of bliss).

By: Nikki

Nikki — Wed, 29 Feb 2012 18:15:23 +0000

We’re not in Mayberry anymore… staying home and ironing underpants. We’re ‘liking’ things on pinterest and reading blogs likes this to be more creative about how we run our homes and lives. Kudos to us!

Guess I’m a hybrid, been doing it for 9 months and like everything it comes with new kinds of stress and perks. I used to work FT and now I work 3 days a week from home, while my son is in daycare.

I get more time with him now then I have, but being on your own and working from home, takes the same organization, focus and motivation — just like my FT job where I was managing a team.

Some days its great, some days not so much. I see little people on those 3 days, but I do get to bring home some of the bacon and do what I love. My sister, is a 100% at-home-no-work mom–while she’s not making cash, she’s raising 3 boys–that’s a job. Some days she calls me crying–it is what it is!

It’s hard enough being a mom and dealing with the mom-guilt and/or bringing home some income and/or wanting more for yourself in terms of a ‘career’ and ‘life’.

I love keeping this question alive… I often circle back to ‘what exactly am I giving 100% to anyway?’ All Moms feel this in burden in some form or another. Feels good to be reminded of it!

By: Michele

Michele — Wed, 29 Feb 2012 01:27:33 +0000

I like the idea of telling people I’m a “work-at-home” mom. I was very fortunate to begin freelancing while I was still pregnant, and have kept it up since my daughter was born in early January. I took a month “off” so that my clients wouldn’t expect great things from me while I was adjusting, but now that I’m back, we’re really finding it works for us. Explaining it to people, though, is a challenge – people don’t see what I do as working. This was a great post to read, really helped put some things I was thinking in some kind of order.

By: Sedge | noob-dad

Sedge | noob-dad — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 06:33:35 +0000

I’m going to be a stay at home dad. No work, no hassles, just 100% focus on baby development.

For awhile it’s going to be boring as hell, but that’s why we blog, isn’t it? As he grows, however, I’ll be able to help him learn and discover out and about. I can’t wait.

By: Michelle

Michelle — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 18:24:02 +0000

You have to do what’s best for you and your family — no one else can tell you the answer to that. For me, working is best. I miss my kid like CRAZY during the day but work is my me-time. I need it for my own sanity. For others, being at home might be the best for their sanity… working at home might be the best. Every option has pros and cons. You have to weigh them for yourself.

By: djrelat7

djrelat7 — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 18:00:46 +0000

I am not there yet, having the kids that is. However, a majority of my clothes friends are married with kids. I see them looking to be parents and work to provide for the house. It makes me wonder if I am in the right place to be able to have children and still earn a decent income to help provide for my household. There can be such a variation between labels of who’s who, Stay at home parent or a Working Parent. But if you’re a parent that works at home, you have the best of both worlds. I would think that would be enough to not care about the label I am interested to hear what others have to say!

By: Sarah

Sarah — Thu, 23 Feb 2012 03:29:14 +0000

I call myself a work-at-home Mom. Best of both worlds. I can contribute to the family income while also being home with my son. To Moms that stay at home without being employed, I know that is work too. I struggle constantly to get things done while chasing around a toddler, esp now that we are potty training!

By: Haidee

Haidee — Thu, 23 Feb 2012 01:14:57 +0000

I struggle w/ my situation even though I know a lot of mothers would love to have my set up. I work full time from home for a major company, and I have a nanny come into the home. I get to have meals with my children, and I also can take them to classes, dr appts, playdates if it works w/ my schedule. That said, I also find that somehow I also do all the chores, food shopping, cleaning, etc. Not because my spouse won’t help, but it falls on me because I’m home and I want our evenings to be as chore free as possible. So I end of straddling the work of a SAHM and a WAHM. And I cannot excel at both, so my work becomes mediocre. I don’t want to give up my career, but I don’t want to be away from my children and not stay on top of the household tasks (a full time job IPO). I end up exhausted. Can I have it all? I don’t think so…

By: Whitney

Whitney — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 19:51:37 +0000

Emily, a fabulous woman once told me to never use the word “just” when I meet someone new. She heard me say that “I just do small projects”, and I KNOW that I’ve said aloud that I am not really an author because I “just co-authored two gift books.” Seriously? What is my problem?

I passed this along to my little sis (also named Emily just before she went for a job interview and it resonated with her as well: If you hear yourself say “just”, simply back up and start your sentence again without that word (and with more enthusiasm).

By: Emily at CityBaby Living

Emily at CityBaby Living — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 19:34:01 +0000

My husband and I were just talking about this last week! I left a 60+ hour a week last spring b/c my daughter was growing up hearing me say “hurry up” and “we’re late” way to much. We made a HUGE shift and I’m now home. But…she’s in preschool 3 days a week. I am trying to get some consulting jobs, and I’m putting a toe into the blogging world, but considering what I used to do for work, it doesn’t really feel like work. That being said, I’m super busy at home, and love taking care of my daughter, our home and our life. So when my husband told a friend that I was “taking a break from work” I got ruffled. So he said, what do you want me to say? (PS, he’s genuinely supportive of this and really wanted to know) I had no answer. Nothing fits exactly. That’s why I was so happy to see this post!

All I do know, is that I find myself saying “just” too much before I answer people (“just” at home, “just” 1 consulting job). There is nothing “just” about what I’m doing.

By: Wendy Copley

Wendy Copley — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 18:18:35 +0000

What Steph said! It took me a long time to notice this, but I’ve found that how I label myself has a lot to do with whether or not I’ve made money in a particular month. It’s really hard for me to define the business-y aspects of my life as “work” when I’m not making enough money to pay even one bill for the month — even when what I’m doing is laying the groundwork to earn money down the road. I’ve also found that since my work has been slooooowly transitioning from hobby to money-maker it’s been hard for me to adjust my mindset from one to the other.