Activity #512: Vent about life as a parent

by Whitney Moss on May 29, 2008

in Mommy,Month 6

I love being a mom. Of course I do. Would I spend this much time blogging and writing a book about enjoying motherhood if I didn’t strongly identify with my momness?

I freely admit, however, that this new hobby job role does take away from my pre-mom hobbies, including the hobby that was my husband and his hobbies.  I no longer go to live music with him. (You’re going to show that starts at 10? Great! Have fun with that!)  I have reduced my offers to host barbecues by about 90%. (Extra grocery trip and clean up? No thanks.)  I could go on, but I don’t want you to start thinking I’m a selfish loser.

I am not a selfish loser, but I am tired, and distracted with details of keeping tabs on the baby nail clippers and making sure there is always milk in the house.  Lame? Maybe.  But I’d guess I’m not alone.  Anyone else feeling oppressed by having to check in with their partner before they take a shower?

My friend Erika, author of The Real Deal Guide to Pregnancy, is embarking on a new project that addresses this situation. She seeks to document how having kids impacts a marriage, and promises to share the results with the world in a book that is yet to be titled.  If you and your partner are willing to INDEPENDENTLY take an extremely confidential survey about life as a couple with children, she’d like to hear from you.

In Erika’s own words: When I became a mom I was floored by how little I’d heard about the everyday challenges that couples face while attempting to maintain a relationship and raise children. Once I joined the club and started sharing my frustrations, however, close friends with kids freely spilled the beans and I learned that our family was not alone in our struggle to find balance and an overall sense of peace in our new roles. Their confessions got me wondering…Why aren’t we openly discussing these realities so that we can support, empathize with, and help each other as we embark on one of life’s most worthy challenges?

She wants me to also say that in order to protect the privacy of contributors and create an environment that is safe for complete honesty, all answers will remain confidential, unattributed, and unrelated to partner’s comments in the book and in general.

If you are up for it, send her the info below via email at erika @ therealdealguide.com. Your contribution promises to help thousands of parents better understand, accept, and appreciate the lives they are leading.

First name:
Last name or initial:
City of residence:
Number of children:
Age of child(ren):
Email address of parent 1:
Email address of parent 2:

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RookieMoms.com co-founder Whitney lives with her husband, son, and daughter in the San Francisco Bay Area where she writes about parenting, crafts, and activities that moms can do with babies in tow. She and Heather also publish 510Families.com, a site for East Bay parents and are the authors of The Rookie Mom's Handbook and Stuff Every Mom Should Know.

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