Those kids. They say and do the darndest things. But if you publish notes about all of them as your Facebook or Twitter statuses, well, {yawn}.
Good etiquette online and in real life requires recognition of a mixed company situation. Listen up, fellow breeders: you must embrace a new definition of mixed company: Parents and Non-Parents.
Remember to filter your thoughts and serve up only the most compelling to your friends and followers.
But don’t worry, Mommy of The Cutest Kid Eva!, there ARE some places to capture the rest of those adorable moments.
- In an email to your baby’s future self.
- In a text message to your partner.
- On OutOfTheMouthsOf.com
Also? At work? Do not talk about labor and delivery in mixed company.
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
LOL. I’ve been guilty of this despite the fact that I’m an older mommy who had to listen to friends’ tales when I was still single. Bottom line: I should know better. Thanks for the reminder.
I remember a bit from a comedienne who said that when parents say “you’re never going to believe what my baby did,” that its almost Never True. All those milestones (rolling over, steps, talking etc.) are pretty much expected. So, unless your child is a 10-pound-still-swaddled valedictorian at Harvard, she’s gonna believe you.
And for those “I want to sell my children” moments, there’s truumomconfessions.
Quite frankly, I don’t care if I am boring people. If you don’t care about it, “hide me” or don’t follow me. I don’t follow what my old college and high school friends say/do any more because I don’t care about the way they are living their lives.
I do my Facebook updates like Star Trek captain’s log updates. I am the Captain, my husband the Chief Engineer, and my son the Pilot, since he dictates a lot of what we do and where we go now.
“Captain’s Log, star date 09-23-09: Today, the pilot and the Chief Engineer spent the day in the park quadrant training to use the new equipment, like the swing and small slide. The Pilot thinks sand would be a good addition to the Mess Hall menu. I’m not so sure, since he stored a lot in his shoes when he came home, and its not that appetizing. Also, he found it quite itchy in his standard issue undergarments.”
This lets me boast about my son’s latest “cute moment” with a bit of humour to engage people who may happen across it. People get a kick out of them.
It’s my twisted hobby–writing about my kids, and it’s a good tool. “Be nice to your mother,” I say to my sassy 17 year old, “Or, I’ll blog about you.” He snarlls–in a cute kind of way. “and” I add, “Then I’ll post my link on your facebook page.”
His jaw drops. “Moooom.”
Okay, I’m kidding, but only by a molecule.
So my fb friends/ enemies, can read me or hide me, or dump me if they really want. But a little bragging or bitching about one’s kids is to be expected from time to time. Thanks for the site. nice topic for contemplation.
I don’t know what’s funnier, the fact that we all know people who do this, or the fact that they don’t even seem to realize how MUCH they do it. My solution? Start my own blog, hahaha, so read at your own risk…
FB asks, “What’s on your mind?” My son is on my mind the majority of the time. I’m not going to make up something else to fit in with the non-parents that are my FB “friends.” Most of my real friends on FB are also parents, and they do actually care what me and my kid up to, as I do for them. Like pp said, anyone who doesn’t care is more than welcome to hide me or de-friend me.
Another option is Plumkeeper (www.plumkeeper.com). Think of it as a more private version of Facebook where you keep a family journal and only allow your close family and friends to see it.
Puh-leez. There’s an assumption here that the status updates of non-breeders are intrinsically, somehow, more interesting than reading about what young human beings are doing. “I need a beer.” “Show tonight at____ bar.” “Celebrity Death du Jour” “I’m on a vacation that you will never be able to afford”–every status update can be perceived as wonderful or as boring, depending upon the reader. Since my FB friends are FRIENDS, I do like to read about what they (and their kids, dogs, crows, cats, bandmates, etc.) are doing. I also like to share what my kids and pets and bandmates and I are doing.
I don’t see the point in telling parents that we need to censor ourselves in order to mollify others. Should I tell my friends who are going on tour with Dethklok not to post too many updates, in fear of boring other FBers? Why should we parents hide the simple fact that we think our kids are great? Why should we hide our love and pride for our kids?
1. I find labor fascinating and ugly and beautiful, despite having not been in it (on the outside anyway) and I think it’s frankly sadly old-fashioned for women (and dads-to-be) to keep mum about such a “taboo” experience that we’ve all been through at least once.
On the other hand, if you’re a boring writer you’re just gonna bore people. Topic hardly matters.