My very smart friend Joanne actually used to report to me. Now she is both a mama and the sole proprietor of her own online store, PenelopePoet.com, and sells beautiful jewelry. (Click here to see my favorite item.) Joanne just emailed me her take on “how to cope when baby doesn’t nap.”
There are days when my little guy does not want to nap. Sometimes, this will happen a couple days in a row. On the days when I’m feeling stretched, I treat myself. Here’s how it works:
Step 1: Take wide-eyed baby and their favorite travel size toy and get in the car.
Step 2: Turn on some tunes. My suggestions: Norah Jones, Feist, David Gray…and depending on the album, maybe even Tom Petty. Keep it mellow and upbeat. (Omit Green Day and other rockers for this trip.)
Step 3: Let the adventure begin. After everyone is all buckled-up in car and the tunes are rolling, pick a starting destination that makes you happy. I like the Starbucks drive-thru on San Pablo Avenue in El Cerrito. Other drive-in places work just as well. The drive-in saves you from having to lug baby in and out of the car. Order coffee, tea, diet-decaf soda, or even water. Doesn’t matter, just pick something refreshing that you enjoy.
Step 4: Wash your vehicle in a drive-thru. The windows will be nice and shinny and you’ll feel sparkly clean too.
Step 5: Find a place to take in a view. I like to drive to the top of the hills and marvel at the sweeping view of the bay. Take a few deep breaths and feel your energy return.
More often than not, my little guy nods off to sleep in the midst of our travels. Not always. Even if he isn’t asleep when we get home, I feel recharged and more prepared for whatever challenges lay ahead for the rest of the day.
Don’t worry if your baby doesn’t transfer from the car to crib without waking up. Bring some reading material. Roll down the car windows, relax and read while he continues to catch his zzz’s.
Depending on your neighborhood, this little exercise is equally effective with a pair of good walking shoes and a comfy stroller. Take along headphones with upbeat music, grab a latte, and stroll around to all that places that make you feel good.
Be kind and gentle to yourself.
Wow – I’d love to collect tips for people who, like me, are dealing with a three-year old who doesn’t nap. How can we be kind and gentle to ourselves when a little elf keeps emerging from his bedroom every 30 seconds asking if rest time is over? Thoughts?
Related Rookie Mom activities (in the spirit of being kind to yourself even without a nap-skipper):
- Activity #94: Drive-through
- Activity #212: Watch the car from afar
- Activity #238: Pretend you’re in Europe
This is the best tip EVER! Such common sense! A calm baby, a calm Mom, and a clean car!
I have a not even two year old who hasn’t napped in a month. I’m going absolutely insane because he really needs the nap. I do to, but I’m not kidding about him. Aaaaargh! Looking forward to those tips! (Or just to get the kid to stay in his bed would be nice, so he can have a chance to sleep at all. This applies to night time too.)
Great tip! I have a 2yo who has absolutely REFUSED to nap for me since we weaned (parent-led, but gentle) a few months ago when I became pregnant with #2 and was pretty sick. Luckily we found that a drive would do the trick. On a good day, she is out less than a mile from the house and I can come home, park in the driveway, read a book, listen to books on tape, take a cat nap myself, catch up on email, etc.
Sometimes it takes her longer to fall asleep, so we explore neighborhoods we haven’t been to, frequent drive-thrus that I enjoy, or just drive.
She gets the benefit of much-needed rest and I get a much-needed break!
This is a wonderful idea! I feel calmer just reading it. ALMOST makes me hope my son won’t want to take a nap soon.
Great tip! I also have an almost 2 year old who refuses to nap and instead plays in his crib for an hour and a half! At least he hasn’t learned to climb out yet… I have found that if I plan my morning so that I know we’ll be in the car around his normal nap time, he will fall asleep right before we get home. Then I unload the car while he’s sleeping and am 90% successful at transferring him to the crib.
Reading these comments makes me a smidge worried about what 2 will be like when we get there! My little one is 10 months old now and for the most part, doesn’t fight the naps too badly yet.
I live in the UK and have just discovered the Rooki Mom’s Website – I think it’s brilliant. Really inspiring and entertaining, we don’t have anything this good over here.
My 18 month old daughter is an angel who frequenly refuses to nap! How good these tips are. My only wish is that we had a few more drive-thru options here as currenly McDonalds is all we’ve got
Thanks for a great Website and such original ideas and tips!
I love your site!
I have four kiddos, the oldest is 4 and the youngest is 4 months, so I rarely get a nap where all of them sleep these days. But when I had fewer kids, I could usually wrangle a nap from them on those nap-resistant days by just laying down with them. At the time I felt guilty, but now I wish I could just snooze away the afternoon alongside my sweet toddlers. Nowadays sometimes I can get my anti-nap older two to fall asleep using our timer. I’ll set it for 30 minutes and tell them that if they stay in their room, read books, and be quiet they can come out when the bell rings. They agree to the deal, but sometimes they fall asleep before the timer goes off. And if they don’t, at least I’ve had 30 minutes to myself.
A three year old who doesn’t nap? Mine gave hers up shortly after we brought her little brother home from the hospital (she was just a little over two).
These are great tips for giving yourself some peace and quiet for an hour or two if the nap isn’t happening.
My problem is I work part time from home so driving around in the car doesn’t let me get work done…so I follow Elizabeth Pantley’s suggestion of a “hush hour”. Quiet music, a book on tape for older kids, a sheet fort and pillows…whatever is relaxing and soothing for the kid. Set the timer. And the kid either plays quietly and independently for an hour or drifts off into a nap.
I know this may sound strange, but when all four of my children were having a rough time taking a nap, I would put them in their swing or crib and run the vacuum cleaner! I would also put them into their carrier and sit it close to the running clothes dryer, they were asleep in less than 5 minutes! And NO, it wasn’t a GAS dryer…Ha!
funny, we do this and i almost ALWAYS start with starbucks if it’s One of Those Days. ahhh. rules are he doesn’t have to nap, but we have to do what i want. ‘coz a mom needs to be happy.
Love it! Great advice! There have been many, many days I needed someone to tell me it was OK to resort to the car to get my baby to sleep. And many, many days I needed permission to indulge in a $5 latte! Never thought of combining the two though… hope you own stock in Starbucks.
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