My little baby Sawyer is three months old. Yay. He smiles now. He gurgles and coos. He is delightfully what every pregnant woman thinks they will get when they come home from the hospital. Know what I mean? He’s not quite so wobbly, there is a LOT less shrieking, and he can sleep for some good long stretches (sometimes*).
Reflections on the first three months: Cuddly and sweet-smelling with a little torture thrown in.
Being a baby mama for the third time meant that I was very well supported by my local and Internet parenting community. Hand-me-downs, twitter advice, and generous surprises of FOOD were so abundant and lovely. So, thanks for that.
But regardless of my prior experience, mothering a newborn is hard (albeit snuggly) work. Whitney told me that six weeks of sleep deprivation is actually considered torture, and I believe her. There were hours at a time when Soy Bean would only sleep on me. And only if I was on the move. If I was well-fed and hydrated (and didn’t have to pee), those were cuddly, happy moments. But if I needed to brush my teeth or make someone’s lunch, ugh!
Help. Can't. Reach. Coffee.
These are a few of my favorite things:
- You already know I love my iPhone.
- Miracle swaddling blanket and Fisher Price side-to-side lamb swing combo. Once Sawyer stopped sleeping only on my body, we moved him into the swing in the adjacent room swaddled up. See the photo to see how we safely rigged him in there. Now getting him out of this sleeping arrangement and into a crib will be my next challenge!
- Philips Avent video monitor. We had a normal audio-only monitor in the past but I admit it, I really like watching “sleeping baby TV.” A setting lets me turn the screen off unless he’s making noise too. **
- Hygeia breast pump. I first heard of the Enjoye when Kristen called it the best breast pump you’ve never heard of on Cool Mom Picks. Unlike nearly every other pump, it can be safely shared and handed down to other moms rather than cluttering the landfills. Yay! I am so grateful to Kate for sending one to me and I can’t wait to pass it along to the next mama! After we finish using it every day.
Some moments, like this one, when he takes a long nap and I can catch my breath, all I want to do is look at pictures of him.
+++
Disclosures, Notes, and Whatnot:
The first three months of this baby’s life were more than a little challenging. Not sure how dark I can get and still be more fun than wiping someone’s tushy, I kept it light. But my gal Whitney remembers it with more clarity. She says, “You felt really terrible and never wanted to leave the house. Nursing hurt. Your back hurt. Your coochie, I don’t know. Your mental state was er, no comment.”
* Don’t get me wrong. We’re not sleeping through the night and to imply that would be to jinx any hope we have of doing so in the near term.
** This monitor was sent to me for free as a replacement for an older model Philips baby monitor that is no longer working. I reviewed that model years ago as part of the Parent Bloggers Network.
That exact swing and swaddle were my saviors. Our first 4 months were torture. My son is now 2 1/2 and I am still terrified to do it again. YAY for 3 months Sawyer!!!
TORTURE. Shrieks, screams, milk, explosive poop, more screams, shuushing, jiggling, walking, crying, hands always full, lap always full, me crying, him crying, never wanting to be alone with all of my children, not being able to brush teeth for an hour of trying, giving up caffeine, never being able to reliably leave the house, breastfeeding, pain, sleeplessness, sleeping only to accidentally wake.
Plus the cuteness.
Your post is bringing back many memories! I will say that our first reading of The Happiest Baby on the Block (alas, 6 weeks in to the 4th trimester) and learning about the “4th trimester” was a help. Didn’t make the sleep deprivation any easier but certainly helped us reframe the first three months.
Like your swing-as-bed, we used our Graco carseat for a bed for a a while — and I was terrified that the boy would never be able to sleep in bed (I found it easy to catastrophize in that 4th trimester!) — but he did. As, I guess, they always do.
Congratulations on starting a new chapter!
OMG, that brings back so many memories. I wish someone had told me about the miracle blanket at the beginning – that thing is the most amazing invention EVER. My daughter wouldn’t go in the swing OR the bouncy chair. Congrats on making it to 3 months – it all gets easier from here on in!
-Dani (https://diapersandstilettos.wordpress.com)
LOVE the realness here … I do remember those days but still needed a little reminder of what’s ahead! Sleep deprivation is THE WORST.
aw, reminds me of my little one when she was little! we used to swaddle her and put her in the swing too, it worked great!
ahh.. the 4th trimester. The Little Lamb swing saved me too
and we swaddled until 9 months. oh yes, we did.
thanks for making me feel like i’m not crazy for not loving these first couple months of baby-life – i’m almost to the end of month 2. phew.
we just completed six months with number three. good times ahead mama! I could not believe how much HARDER it was with the third. I new what I was doing, besides the million things I forgot, but it was still hell. lots of pain. no leaving house. extended witching hours. no taking of bottle. no pacifier. no warranty. no going back.
and now i can’t remember life without him.
Thanks for that!!
I know I’m hard on myself because of this site… Must Make It Fun!!!
We are currently trying to get my 4.5 month old out of the swaddle and bouncy chair, and hopefully into her crib. Anyone… thoughts?
Ooh, so many of my favorite things too. Great list Heather! (And love that baby pic. You look pretty darn awesome for no coffee + 4th trimester.)
[...] inside jokes, freelance writing pieces for her review, and planning outings. When I wrote about the end of the fourth trimester in a blog post last year, Whitney accused me of glossing over the tough stuff. I finally had the courage, more than a year [...]