Can you hear the baby squawking from where you’re sitting? I can. And it sure is hard to concentrate. Doesn’t he realize that I’m trying to write a blog post about him? Gah.

Okay, that’s better now. Where was I? Oh yes… Sawyer, my sweet baby love, my third boy, is about to head off to daycare and I am conflicted.

On the one hand, I am so relieved to be able to concentrate on work during working hours and not be shushing and nursing my way through conference calls or in-person meetings as I have been doing for the past five months. I am looking forward to trying to cram my work back into the school day rather than the unpredictable minutes of naptime or after bedtime. I am ready for a little bit of quiet. With my work being done during work hours, I’ll be able to better focus on my children during family time.

But then. There’s the other hand, of course. The hand that has gotten so accustomed to loving, bouncing, and comforting a small person every second of the day will be empty again. My almost-definitely-for-sure last baby is taking his first tiny steps out of my nest. Just writing that makes me stick my lower lip out into a frowny pout.

Taken today. Maybe THEY can get him to nap outside of the swing.

I love the childcare place where Sawyer is going. That’s not the problem. Milo, nearly five now, is in his last year of preschool in the same building and has assured me that he will keep an eye out for his little brother in the infant room. Making it even easier to trust the process, Milo started in the very same room with the same teachers when he was a blobby little baldy.

If I were speaking to a new mom friend worried about the daycare transition, I would gently offer that the first two weeks are especially painful for the mom. No matter how many babies she’s had. The baby will thrive in his new environment. I know this. I’ve seen it over and over. I might tell her about the first-day I left Holden with his nanny (also five months old, the very week I returned to work and started this site), and I had to run to the bedroom and cry when she asked me a few too many questions about his basic care.

But still I sit here with my frown, wishing that bitter pill of transition had already started working.

Because Whitney is forcing me to take a maternity leave, I have asked several online friends to help out with guest posts. I am grateful to Kristen Chase for sharing her version of how to take a maternity leave from blogging so I can share it with you and learn from her example. I hope you enjoy the many great voices coming together this month!

Kristen with Drew, Bridget, Quinlan, and Margot

Because my job is so incredibly flexible and I’m a little Type-A, I relied on the persistence of my friend and co-publisher Liz Gumbinner to force me into a maternity leave.

My rationale, especially with my 2nd through 4th kids, was that I wasn’t really getting a break anyway since I had another kid (or two) to chase around, so the work, for me, was a distraction and a way to pass the somewhat boring breastfeeding hours, particularly late at night.

For my other writing gigs, I did my best to finish my work in advance, and then give them an idea of when thought I’d be ready to return. The beauty of working with (and for) moms is that they are very understanding about post-partum recovery. If only all employers (and colleagues) were like that.

I do, however, think that it’s important to take a break, whatever that means to you, and if you don’t have someone like Liz or a team supporting you, then I’d remind friends and family to insist on it, even if they know you’ll push back a bit.

photo credit: Kelly from Amerine Photography

Kristen writes so many places, I’m sure you are already reading her somewhere: Cool Mom Picks, Motherhood Uncensored, The Pioneer Woman (ok, she’s not THE woman, but she writes there sometimes!), Momanatrix, and more. I am so grateful to my online, real life friend for sharing her tips.

This contest is now closed. The winner will be notified. The book below is still a break-through so read on.

When I read the new children’s book  Monday is One Day to my kids for the first time, I felt like doing a little jig. Yay for working parents! Yay for kids being raised by grandparents! And for twins! Of color! Yay for parents who wear uniforms to work! Yay for families who have two dads!

Each page of this book validates some child’s special family — and together all of them acknowledge that although we may drop our little ones off at daycare, we are finding fun things throughout the week to celebrate, until the weekend comes again.

Monday is one day, Tuesday is blue shoes day, and Wednesday is halfway day.

If you think your child would enjoy this story, designed to relieve separation anxiety, here’s a way to get the book — and more — into your hands.  Win it from us.

We are super excited about this giveaway because it includes a mini-collection of Scholastic books AND a set of days of the week underwear from Paul Frank. (I know you want these for yourself, too, because I sure do.)

Two (2) winners who comment on this post will receive:

• A copy of Monday is One Day!
• Days of the week undies for a little girl or boy
• 3 additional titles from Scholastic for ages 3+

This bundle is valued at $105 and is courtesy of Scholastic. (Book image courtesy of Scholastic. Copyright 2011 © by Arthur A. Levine. All rights reserved.)

To be entered, tell us what special attribute of YOUR family do you wish to see reflected in a book? Two commenters will be selected at random to win the prizes. Random drawing on Wednesday, June 1, 2011.

When a discussion of using a housekeeper exploded over on The Happiest Mom, I was taken by surprise. More than a hundred women commented on Meagan’s post about outsourcing housecleaning. Many felt too guilty to consider it and more than a few took a stand against it.

My husband and I have a cleaning person come to our house twice per month, and we also have someone who mows our lawn and tends to our landscaping every other week. When Meagan’s commenters started accusing women who outsource household labor of spending their time and efforts on the wrong things, I started making a mental list of all the things I outsource that I could be doing myself.

I could grow all my own vegetables, but I buy them at the grocery store.

I could change my own oil; I’m sure my dad would be happy to teach me how.

I could hem dresses that are too long for me, but I take them to a tailor. Heck, I could sew the dresses myself, but it would take so long, they’d fit poorly, and buying the fabric and notions would probably cost as much.

But I don’t do those things, and I don’t feel guilty about it.

About every two months, I get a pedicure. And if less time has gone by, say six weeks, it’s possible that I will have not cut my toenails in between visits to the nail salon. It is then that I laugh at myself and think “Who am I that I outsource the cutting of my toenails? That’s just plain weird!”

(Yet I outsource my eyebrow maintenance, and I don’t feel uncomfortable about it.)

I know I might get blasted on this post for confessing these behaviors, as a commenter on The Happiest Mom wrote underneath my comment

Because you have soooo much more pressing things to do with your time (making your own notepads–good grief–and going to mommy “summits”) it’s great you have “Maria” (gee, I wonder, could she be latin/hispanic?) to clean your house. Does nobody else find this nauseating?

I don’t feel I have to defend the way I spend my time to a stranger, so I won’t go there.

I actually have made a handful of articles of clothing for myself with my sewing machine. Once, I made a potholder.  I went through a beading phase and made necklaces. And now that I have kids came along I make things for them. Because it’s fun.

Usually, however, I buy things for myself already made. Isn’t this outsourcing? And usually I take my car to a car wash. (And when I am working, another woman puts my child down for her nap.)

Somehow, outsourcing housecleaning and childcare are the hot buttons. I’m guessing folks aren’t judging each other for buying bottled lemonade instead of making it from lemons.

When I hear people express guilt over hiring help, whether it’s for cleaning or childcare, I want to relieve that guilt for them. But we can’t tell each other how to feel.

So tell me, do you cut your own toenails?

Marketing Mommy is a blogger in the Chicago area who has two kids born pretty darn close to mine. And we both had a victorious VBAC with #2, and, we are both in marketing, so we were like, totally best friends, even before we ever really had a conversation.

She works full time, so pumping is part of her every day life. I feel for her, because I so hated the pump and all of it’s parts when I worked outside the home during Julian’s babyhood. Also, there were random drips of breast milk on my pump’s carrying case and sometimes on my lap. Sorta gross, even though I’m not sure why.

Miss Marketing Mommy invented herself a solution. She called it the “Pump Parts Terry Bag,” and like a good marketer, she sells us on it by describing the problem it solves:

My breast pump came with an ugly black tote bag (which I don’t use), but it didn’t come with a good solution for toting all of the pump’s parts and accessories, the horns and valves that come into contact with milk and have to be cleaned between pumping sessions.

Since I pump twice a day, I was washing those parts with dish detergent and hot water and giving them a cursory drying with paper towels. But they never seem to get really dry.

I’d been keeping them in a gallon Ziploc bag in my backpack, but I didn’t like how fogged up the bag would become and I hated using damp parts. Also, I found that cleaning the Ziploc bag even once a week was a pain in the butt. And I was never positive that it was really clean.

Enter the Pump Parts Terry Bag!

This velcro-close bag, designed by me and sewed from an old towel by my sweet mother-in-law, holds all of my pump parts and doubles as a lap pad for me, protecting my work pants from inadvertent milk drips.

No more damp horns and I can throw it into the wash every couple of days!

Nice work, MM!

Related activity: The Pumping Project (Share your story!)

Dear Rookie Moms,

I have had 4 glorious months of maternity leave and am returning to full-time work in the first week of January. We have child care arranged and a steadily growing stash of pumped milk in the freezer.

I would love to know what other rookie (and veteran!) moms did to ease back into the working world. Feeling really sad that this time with my daughter is almost over, and guilty that I won’t be with her everyday.

Thank you!
Sierra

Hi Sierra,
I feel you. We both returned to work around the same time as you, and it was not easy. Studies do show that your baby will be fine, and thrive, as long as she is well cared for but your guilt is another matter. The first two weeks are especially challenging while you find your new groove and try not to lactate at work every time someone asks you casually, “how’s motherhood?” or something else impossible to answer. I’d love to open it up to our community for tips and tricks for you as well. [See below!]

Even after doing it for a while now, I do not know how people eat dinner with two working parents. It’s a constant source of amazement to me. I dedicated a section of our site to work/life (as in balance but more like juggling) and also getting dinner on the table FAST.

Hang in there,
Heather

We got a ton of helpful suggestions from our virtual community on facebook and twitter. Thanks, ladies! Here are several favorites:
Set some boundaries

• @beeteljooz: Focus on work while there. Leave work at workplace, go home and enjoy baby! Only your children and your husband will remember time missed with you. Learn to say no! Let dad and grandparents help Take time out for yourself. The old saying goes: If mom ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!
• @civil3diva: Own your decisions. If something is making you feel guilty, chances are you need to change. Be brave, do what you know is right!

Master the logistics

• @beeteljooz: Use a crockpot for meals. Throw one more load of clothes in washer before leaving for work and one before going to bed at night. Keep two diaper bags ready to go to save on time when you are in a rush.
• @esanchez6 Lay out as much as you can the night before, maybe even try to prepare bottles for night feedings.
• @HowVeryGranola: Exercise after baby goes to sleep, find another mom to talk with, journal/blog, breathe, get a crockpot, accept the messy house. If you can, get a housekeeper to come 1-2x per month. Not as expensive as you might think.
• @meetmoe: Mostly know that it’s HARD and it’s OKAY and let go of perfection.

Ride the emotional roller coaster

• @HotMessMommy: Returning to work is hard and no one will truly understand how you feel about it. It’s so personal.
• @Beckytwogirls: Be prepared to want to call the day care provider all day. If you have a good provider, she’ll indulge you a little.
• @hikerkira: I found that having too many pics of my baby was distracting and made me miss him even more.
• @lizzieoeltjen: I set aside time each week for mommy time with kiddo, no exceptions. Let the dishes sit in sink and make time for play.
• @HBWMoms: Get a routine every morning that’s special just for you and your baby. Mine was an eskimo kiss and 3 hugs and then let go =)
• @lesleytweeters: Don’t beat yourself up if you quit cloth diapering! [or any of the other things that you need to let slide]
• @abourland: Don’t let stay at home moms get you down or make you feel like you are doing something wrong by going to work. [ahh yes, the proverbial mommy wars]
• @maggieKTVB7: Know that the tears will pass! It takes a few days though. Soon, you get in a routine and baby does too.

Sierra, after you get in the groove, please share some of your tips back with us! Good luck.
And readers, we’re always open to your tips. Please add to the list!

[photo via flickr by Hammer51012]

Today we’re hearing Elizabeth’s story as our sixth and last official Method Fearless Friday post. Liz is Mom to Patrick, 13 mos, 2 mutts, and wife to Brendan. She works in training and development for the biotech industry in Cambridge, MA.

Patrick was born just over a year ago and I cannot believe how many things have changed since then: I lost my job, we sold our house and moved, and I landed my dream job in Boston. When I think about one thing that impacted so much of my perception of the past year it has been our reactions to breastfeeding. These days when I hear breastfeeding discussed, I remember the fear, trepidation, sadness, anger, and (hopefully) JOY!

Some of our my most fearful moments involved him eating: trying to get a latch in the few moments post delivery, getting through the first week, feeding him for the first time in public, the back seat of my car, the changing room of a clothing store – all because he wanted a snack. We totally operated on his schedule.

I feel lucky too. I did not stress too much before he was born, I had a strong supply, I had extraordinary support from my husband, and he was a good eater who never turned down a meal.

I had been let go from my job shortly after Patrick was born due to a national downsizing. At this time, my husband and I decided to sell our house and finally move back to Boston. Patrick had nursed exclusively for 5.5 months when I started interviewing for new jobs in Boston. I was committed to not alerting potential employers that I was the mother of an infant, let alone one that was nursing.

For a particular job interview, I had to fly down to headquarters in New Jersey and was very nervous. My husband took the day off to stay with Patrick. All I had to do was buy a new suit (because nothing fit), figure out how to fly to Newark, interview, and squeeze in pumping along the way.

I planned out a schedule to make it all work. I flew down, took a cab to the interview, and pumped and dumped in the bathroom (I couldn’t bring the liquids home with me) before my interview.

Feeling very proud of myself I walked in to the interview with a huge sense of confidence that I had made it all work.

Then — during the first couple of minutes of the two hour interview — I heard a strange muffled sound. My breast pump had turned itself on in my bag!!!!!! I took a moment, a deep breath, and said to the interviewer “my cell phone is vibrating in my bag, I am finding it distracting, if you don’t mind, I am going to reach in to my bag and turn it off.” And so I did.

The interview went well and I flew home uneventfully. Patrick had done great with Dad, and I got called in for a second interview. Although I didn’t take that job. I was offered my dream job two weeks later. Thankfully, my new company is very supportive of new moms. Patrick has done well with the transition and I am forever grateful for the time I got to spend at home with him.
As a rookie mom, I always tried to overcome my fears with planning. It was in that one moment I learned that I can’t plan for everything, but as a mom, I have a new found ability to think quickly and adapt!

This post is part of Fearless Fridays, a series sponsored by method who make green home cleaning products. If you are already a fan, join the people against dirty™ at facebook.com/method.

Heather is on a family vacation right now, but in just a few days we’ll be meeting in New York City to attend BlogHer ’10, a conference for women who are bloggers.

This is, apparently, what bloggers look like. At certain hours.

This conference is unique in that it is about different things for different people. For many women, it’s about a hobby that’s introduced them to friends who they have never or rarely met. For these folks, it’s a girls weekend away/slumber party/mom’s night out. For some, it’s a professional conference as they earn a living by writing blog posts. For some, it’s even more professional as they’ll be representing not just themselves, but also the companies they work for, connecting with bloggers in hopes of identifying some with whom they might work on a social media campaign the future.

The three-day event is packed with parties and activities in addition to the conference panels and sessions.

As such, everyone is very very excited about being there, some to the point of crashing and burning because it’s all too much.  I pride myself on maintaining balance, sanity and saying “no” when something is more than I can handle, so I am going with a list of things I look forward to doing at BlogHer. If I do most of them, it will be a success.

1. Tell as many people as possible about the Huggies Every Little Bottom program and talk about my recent adventures with diaper donations. Huggies has gotten really involved with diaper donations and is paying my way for BlogHer.  I’ll spend some time at their booth on the Expo floor sharing information about diaper shortages and how we can all contribute.
2. Tell Kristen’s belly that I still feel badly that I didn’t cook large, healthy meals for her when she was secretly pregnant at my house for 24 hours.
3. Take a cute “bangs + glasses” photo with Danielle Friedland, who like me, wears bangs and glasses.
4. Introduce one of my favorite real-life friend bloggers, Wendy, who will be a BlogHer virgin, to people who will be kind and gentle to her.
5. Hug the friends I made from Portland over the past couple of BlogHers: Asha, Gina, and Katherine.
6. Steal Rachel from method‘s drink tickets because she is a rookie mom-to-be (and make sure that she meets Meagan “The Happiest Mom” Francis, who I am looking forward to meeting.)
7. Do something “off campus” even if it’s just eat middle eastern food from a street cart with my online fraternal twin Marketing Mommy whose two kids were  each born within two weeks of mine.
8. Be inspired to write better, edit more thoughtfully, and up my blogging game by attending all the sessions in the writing track of the conference.
9. Meet up with other women who produce local guides for parents like ours (such as Jessica, Christine, Erin + Rachael, and Anna) — and then roll around and smother myself in all their good ideas
10. High five everyone who has been working so hard on athletic and fitness goals (such as Amelia Sprout, Julie Marsh, and the eat, blog, run crowd)
11. Ride a mechanical bull for the first time and impress fellow Healthy Child Healthy World ambassadors like Whitney from Mommies With Style with my unexpected bull-riding abilities

P.S. If you don’t already read it, BlogHer.com is a site packed with good content from a bazillion passionate bloggers.  Today I have an article on the home page there: Back To School: 10 Great Rain Gear Choices for Kids

If you work away from home, odds are good that commuting back is a rushed frenzied time. If that’s true, you’re ruining it! This is prime-mama-alone time.

Take our advice and savor these tiny moments:

• If you’re driving a short distance: sing a song that takes you back in time. Really belt it out.
• If you’re driving a long distance: catch up on an audio book.
• If you’re biking: chill out and breathe.
• If you’re riding public transit (like me now!): zone out with a non-parenting book or music on your iPod.

Relish this gift of alone time and you’ll be a happier mama when you get home. For real. Or you could keep hurrying and cursing and feel totally frazzled again.

See also act the way you want to feel.

Today we are happy to have some relevant tips from Laurie Puhn, who is a rookie mom to toddler Blake (above), a relationship advice blogger and the author of Instant Persuasion: How to Change Your Words to Change Your Life.

Laurie says:

Becoming a parent has changed more than who I am; it’s changed my relationship with my husband. We’ve found that patience and time together are rare commodities. We take shifts caring for our son on the weekend (“Oh, he has a birthday party to go to? Can you take him so I can get some things done at home?”), and at times we bicker about things like who was supposed to put the child locks on the dining room cabinet.

If you’re a rookie mom and your man is a rookie dad, then like us, you’re in a “rookie relationship,” meaning that you’re in the midst of the trials of new parenthood. Nothing challenges a relationship more than parenting young children. Research shows that 90% of couples say their relationships are worse after their first baby. Yikes!

Now more than ever we need a plan to stay connected and in love during these most stressful years of marriage. Here are some fun activities my husband and I do together, which have made a huge difference for us. Perhaps they will make a difference for you too.

1. Plan Family Playdates. Since you can’t always find a sitter to cover a Friday night double date, invite another couple with their kids to come over for brunch on the weekend. Not only can you trade off babysitting duty, but the kids are more likely to occupy themselves when they have other kids to play with.
2. Have a Cocktail Party. After the kids go to bed, throw a very private party. About once a month I heat up frozen appetizers, light candles, put on mood music and my husband and I find ourselves dancing and laughing at ourselves.
3. Hire the Babysitter, Early. If you have a dinner reservation for 7:30pm, don’t hire the babysitter for 7pm so you have to rush to get the kids in order before you run out of the house, all stressed out and sweaty. Be kind to yourself. Hire the sitter to come at 5:30 or 6. Isn’t a little extra money every now and then worth an hour to relax, cuddle in bed together and then get dressed in peace?
4. Use Tech Toys to Your Advantage.
   I’m not talking about sex toys! I’m talking about cell phones and computers. Make it a habit to send each other a sweet text or e-mail message about once a day. A simple, “thinking of you, baby,” is enough to make my day.
5. Kiss and Touch with a Little Audience. Private time is hard to come by, so don’t wait for your kids to be out of sight before you sneak over to your husband and rub his back. When he’s playing with your kids go over and kiss him. Touch his arm. Sit close to him on the couch. These little connections show my man and my son that we are all here, together, right now. And I love it.

Laurie’s blog, Expecting Words, helps expecting couples rise to the challenges of pregnancy, and offers advice for new parents, like “breastfeeding is a man’s job too!” and “why moms are meanies.” Between the personal stories and friendly advice, expecting couples and rookie parents will find humor and a compassionate friend in Laurie.

If you think there’s a chance you can be mistaken for a non-parent who can Work Hard and Play Hard just like any other twenty-something-single dude, then, by all means, don’t read this book.

If, however, you are struggling along (like the rest of us) to find some BALANCE between those conflicting forces of guilt and pleasure called WORK and HOME, then Happy at Work, Happy at Home is another great book in the library of the working mom. It is at once supportive, encouraging, and practical.

I was in a job interview recently (while this book was tucked in the backpack at my feet) vacillating between pretending I was a childfree workaholic and knowing better. Of course my interviewer actually said, “I like to work hard and play hard” and fished for personal information about me with “I don’t know if you have any kids…” so it’s no wonder I feel conflicted asking for what I need and deserve.

I was very lucky to hear authors Caitlin and Kim speak at a working moms lunch. Ironically, I think I was the only person there without a “real job” but that’s not my point. They were smartly dressed (not my usual vocabulary but seriously cute dresses!) and humble in discussing the sticky web of topics surrounding working parents.

They told us during their presentation that their first draft of this book, written after interviewing dozens of high-power working moms, was a depressing collage of women on the brink. It turns out that there are many mistakes, and if you ask enough working moms, you will find someone who has made every one of them. At one time or another, we’ve all been guilty of taking on too much, taking on too little, and being known as the person who says all the wrong things. At least that was some comfort. Schadenfreude always is, yes?

After putting on their rose-colored glasses and working with an editor, the book morphed into a positive, upbeat collection of lessons learned the hard way. These working-mom-life-lessons are now organized and offered to us so that we can make a new batch of mistakes and avoid some of the common ones.

Here are a few of Kim and Caitlins’ 100 Reasons why it’s great to be a working mom:
Working moms…
5. Know that personal lives matter.
28. Delegate with respect.
56. Keep their word.
65. Set clear expectations.
80. Read the room.
82. Dress for success.
99. Keep lots of balls in the air.

Yes. Yes. And yes. Just as a former colleague told me recently, “You were great when we worked together, and I know you’re even better now.” We might all need some mantras of affirmation, but the working-me is still in there. And the me-who-deals-with-crazy-boys all the time is the cherry on top of the sundae.

Buy Happy at Work, Happy at Home on Amazon and throw us a few nickels.
Read more about their work with the Girls’ Guide at HappyatWorkHappyatHome.com.

—-
I got the book for free for attending their Yodeling Mamas lunch. I think I also got a salad and bottle of water. Though the talk was great, the monetary value was probably not equal to the gas I used to drive to the event in Sunnyvale.

Getting to 50/50 is very well-researched and chock full of data. In fact, if you were committed to the SAHM-life before reading it, beware, this book might have you throwing out your diaper bag for a laptop bag.

I originally posed the question, “are you already at 50/50?” a few weeks ago. Here’s my nitty gritty book review:

As I mentioned, I had ordered this book hoping that it would change my life – that it would give me the ingredients for negotiating a 30-hour workweek for both my husband and me. Nope. No such luck.

The book is very clearly targeted to women/wives and not men or couples. The authors probably want to reach women on the precipice of becoming mothers to convince them that they don’t need to drop out of the work world to be nurturing parents.

If you or your partner think the only way to have well-adjusted kids is to stay home with them all the time in forfeit of your own career goals, the first section of the book offers a compelling alternative view.

The whole first section is making the case for women to work. The book offers many statistics and studies to convince you that women should work: benefits to the wife’s career and happiness, benefits to marital satisfaction, and benefits to the husband’s career satisfaction/work options/life stress/and paternal involvement. I’m totally sold, or else I wouldn’t have bought this book.

If you are already convinced that you should work but you are looking for a way to balance the efforts of you and your husband at work and at home, I think this section is a waste of time to read. If you’re already a working mom, you can just read the headings and jump to the second section.

The second part was the most compelling: I immediately recognized my own bad behavior in sabotaging my career and was keenly interested. I kept putting the book down to ruminate on the ideas or tell my husband what I learned. In a nutshell, it details how our culture – the US culture of work – has become an unhealthy 24/7 requirement in which face time trumps working smart.

The second part also includes 5 well-known “taxes” on women workers (why we are not paid as much as men over the history of a full-life body of work) and related loopholes of how to get around them.

Extremely useful tips, people. I gobbled it up as I eagerly awaited the instructions for making my own 50/50 land-grab. (Or was it 30/30?)

The last chapter is about getting buy-in at home because the ways we treat our baby-daddies can influence getting the 50/50 life. Oh crap, I thought, I’m already doing most of this. Reading this section it finally dawned on me that I may already have 50/50 because my husband does the dishes and alternates sick-child-care. Was I reading this book for no good reason? Sadly, the answer is a big maybe.

Though I enjoyed the book immensely, it did not really answer my core question of “WELL, HOW DO I GET TO 50/50 ALREADY?!” instead, it pointed out the things I could have done better along the way to get where I am. Perhaps I shouldn’t have been so vocal about punching out at 3pm. Perhaps I should have returned to my job after my maternity leave rather than chucking it. Oops and oops.

On the plus side, Getting to 50/50 made me less fearful of a full-time job, which is exciting. And maybe that’s the kick in the pants I needed so my husband can scale down his workload. Since we’re equal partners at home and in bread-winning (a cheesy word, but you get my meaning), then the way we do it is just to do it.

What about me?
I have been hovering in the 20 to 30 hours a week level of employment since I returned to work after Holden was born. Before children, I was a great worker bee, putting in long hours to satisfy my perfectionism and sense of irreplaceability. Since having kids, I’ve been waving the flag of part-time worker so loud and high that I’ve forgotten to be results-oriented and forgotten to measure my impact and performance back to my bosses.

No more.

The biggest takeaways for me were that 1) my husband is already awesome and pretty darn 50/50 and 2) I can do a much better job of being taken seriously at work by not acting like everyone’s bff and, instead, focusing on results.

A long time ago, I stumbled upon this website for Equally Shared Parenting, which promises half the work and all the fun. And their book comes out in January 2010. I guess that’s what I need to read next. I’ll report back when I do.

Or else I need to stop reading books about getting a job and get a job.