Rookie Moms

The wonderful thing about an almost-nine-month old is that fabulous head control that just screams “put me in a baby jogger and let’s see how fast this thing can go.”

This weekend, I had the very real pleasure of sending my husband out for a run with not one baby, but both!! I had a full extra half hour of near-sleep (after loading everyone up and making some mini waffles for the road) and a luxurious, uninterrupted shower so I could start making pancakes and bacon without anyone crawling up my leg. Yay!

Send your partner out for a short run with the jogging stroller and you can catch up on sleep, phone calls, or reading. Make sure to check with your pediatrician before the first trip for any safety tips.

We know there are those people whose infants start sleeping eleven or twelve hours a night around four months old. These so-called “babies” take three daily naps at 8, 12 and 4.30. And then there are the rest of us.

At one point my moms group’s weekly discussion was so dominated by sleep that we were starting to get sick of each other, even though we needed each other so very badly, because no one else would be willing to listen to us talk with such hysteria about our child’s sleep habits.

Because it was a sensitive issue, I emailed the group ahead of time suggesting that at our next gathering, we would censor the subject unless it was a serious mental health situation that someone needed to address. I proposed a list of alternative topics that would help rejuvenate us and make us laugh during our meeting. We did this twice and it was tons of fun.

Our format was to go around in a circle and each answer the proposed alternative-to-how-is-your-baby-sleeping question Here are some conversation starters for you:

• What brought you to live here?
• Where did you go to college and what did you study?
• What were you going to name the baby if it was the opposite gender?
• Tell us about the relationship you had before you were with your partner.

These may sound basic, but when you’ve spent all of your bonding time discussing strollers and nipples, you may have left out some basic facts. Try it and let us know how it goes.

My very smart friend Joanne actually used to be my employee. Now she is both a mama and the sole proprietor of her own online store, PenolopePoet.com, and sells beautiful jewelry. (Click here to see my favorite item.) Joanne just emailed me her take on “how to cope when baby doesn’t nap.”

There are days when my little guy does not want to nap. Sometimes, this will happen a couple days in a row. On the days when I’m feeling stretched, I treat myself. Here’s how it works:

Step 1: Take wide-eyed baby and their favorite travel size toy and get in the car.
Step 2: Turn on some tunes. My suggestions: Norah Jones, Feist, David Gray…and depending on the album, maybe even Tom Petty. Keep it mellow and upbeat. (Omit Green Day and other rockers for this trip.)
Step 3: Let the adventure begin. After everyone is all buckled-up in car and the tunes are rolling, pick a starting destination that makes you happy. I like the Starbucks drive-thru on San Pablo Avenue in El Cerrito. Other drive-in places work just as well. The drive-in saves you from having to lug baby in and out of the car. Order coffee, tea, diet-decaf soda, or even water. Doesn’t matter, just pick something refreshing that you enjoy.
Step 4: Wash your vehicle in a drive-thru. The windows will be nice and shinny and you’ll feel sparkly clean too.
Step 5: Find a place to take in a view. I like to drive to the top of the hills and marvel at the sweeping view of the bay. Take a few deep breaths and feel your energy return.

More often than not, my little guy nods off to sleep in the midst of our travels. Not always. Even if he isn’t asleep when we get home, I feel recharged and more prepared for whatever challenges lay ahead for the rest of the day.

Don’t worry if your baby doesn’t transfer from the car to crib without waking up. Bring some reading material. Roll down the car windows, relax and read while he continues to catch his zzz’s.

Depending on your neighborhood, this little exercise is equally effective with a pair of good walking shoes and a comfy stroller. Take along headphones with upbeat music, grab a latte, and stroll around to all that places that make you feel good.

Be kind and gentle to yourself.

Wow - I’d love to collect tips for people who, like me, are dealing with a three-year old who doesn’t nap. How can we be kind and gentle to ourselves when a little elf keeps emerging from his bedroom every 30 seconds asking if rest time is over? Thoughts?

Related Rookie Mom activities (in the spirit of being kind to yourself even without a nap-skipper):

• Activity #94: Drive-through
• Activity #212: Watch the car from afar
• Activity #238: Pretend you’re in Europe

Is that an expression? Well, if button up is… I figured I could use it.

Anyway, when Holden was a few days old, Alec tried to give him is first manicure. This innocent ritual ended with snipping off the end of his little thumb and us putting mittens on him for the next three weeks.

Five good reasons for baby mittens:

1. Babies won’t scratch their little faces unwittingly
2. You can avoid trimming those razor-sharp talons or avoid looking at where you snipped your precious baby’s finger already (for a little while only)
3. You could be seriously entertained by your choice of handwear
4. Cootie-laden strangers won’t grab your babies hands
5. Warmth

Holden wore some mittens that made him look like a court jester. You can go that route or the uber-cool, hipster, tattoo-hands route. Buy some plain ones and experiment with your own style.

[Link and image via BloggingBaby]