There are many choices of bras with little hooking flaps. How does a rookie mom decide? Allow me to help. With my 30+ months of breastfeeding experience and access to a dozen different kinds of bras, I have a few strong opinions for you.

At a bare minimum, you need three nursing bras. One to sleep in, one for daytime, and one that can do either in a pinch. Here are my personal guidelines on your nursing bra wardrobe:

1. The sleeping bra. The main job is to keep your breast pads in place. I like the Bravado basic thingie (top) and this bamboo one from bellabumbum (lower). The Bravado has more support but the bellabumbum is barely there and was perfect for the hospital.
   
2. The daytime bra. I like this one from Anita but wish that I didn’t buy white because it feels so culinary-school issue. It is comfortable and supportive. There’s also the DIY option nursing bra made from your favorite regular bra.
   
3. The specialty bra. Do you need a nursing bra for jogging or swimming? Maybe so. I got a Moving Comfort Fiona sports bra with velcro straps for use during and after my exercise class. Let’s just say that a regular sports bra is very inconvenient for breastfeeding. Picture it.
   
4. The sexy one. Whether you want to feel extra pretty during the day or on a date or if you still need to keep pads in place during business time, a sexy bra is a worthwhile purchase. I love this one from Cake. Also, our friend the mominatrix shared her favorites here.
5. The nursing tank. Ladies, I’m up in the air about tanks and shirts with such a singular focus to the extent that I wrote a nursing top smackdown about just them. In this context, let’s call them optional and move on.

Other hard-earned tips I have for you:

• Buy a soft-banded sleep bra before the baby comes around week 37 or so. But wait until about 4-5 weeks afterward to purchase the others. Get fit by a professional if possible. Here is a handy buying guide from consumerreports.org.
• Buying a bra online is tricky but possible. Many of the better websites will help you through the process and accept returns.
• White is boring and depressing. Nude is also boring and depressing but will show less under white tops. I prefer black and fun colors.
• Make sure to jump in your sports bra before purchase. After your six week appointment, of course.
• And, anything that can’t be opened and closed with just one hand is bullshit. Try the one-hand closure with each hand.

I’d love to hear what you think, either here or in our Facebook discussion.

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Disclosure: I received some Bravado bras as a gift but bought the rest. All opinions are mine. All pictured boobs are not mine.

Yes, you deserve a beautiful (dare I say “sexy”?) nursing bra that makes you remember you’re a curvy woman and not a cow. The thoughtful people at Cake Lingerie sent me the one below, called Licorice, and I love it.

The good: The bra is super pretty, comfortable, and it has a flexible wire that lifts things into place while maintaining optimum health.

The bad: No complaints but these bras (and matching undies) are a bit of a splurge. I think they make a great gift from the partner who still thinks you’re beautiful.

The ugly: Because I don’t look like this model, I’m not going to try it on for you (though they do have a terrific campaign in progress called Real Moms, Real Fit that shows all kinds of body shapes). If you want to see me in it, the best you can hope for is that I might flash you by mistake when feeding my little guy. Which is not altogether unlikely (Umm, sorry about that, Whitney and Wendy).

Bottom line: I recommend it highly for a special occasion or every-day treat. If you like, you can buy online (which is really really hard for bras because good fit is so important) or find a store near you.

Related:

• You’re good enough, you’re smart enough and you deserve a nice bra or two
• 5 Sexy nursing bras by the mominatrix

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Disclosure: Cake sent me sample products for editorial consideration.

Did you know that Hypnobirthing and Hypnobabies are two different things? Uhh, we didn’t. A rookie-mom-to-be recently asked us via twitter about a cheat sheet for different child birth methods. When I answered that it sounded like a good assignment, she took it and ran with it (don’t tell her, but I meant assignment for us to do). Thanks so much Bri for demystifying these methods and terms.

With my first baby on the way I feel like I’ve been cramming for the biggest test I will ever take. Between getting the scoop on consumer reports stroller ratings, navigating California maternity leave laws, and catching up the latest research on child development– the idea of picking a birth method class is overwhelming. I was unable to find a quick and easy cheat sheet on my options so I jumped at the opportunity to put one together for Rookie Moms.

Child Birth Options Cheat Sheet
The important thing seems to be finding the class that fits you. Whether this is your first pregnancy or ninth each mama and pregnancy is different.

Birthing From Within: A holistic approach to child birth with a focus on physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual and social preparation. Expecting parents learn pain coping strategies and physiology as well as participate in introspective activities like journaling and art projects.

Bradley Method: Once called “Husband-Coached Childbirth”, the Bradley Method is founded on the principle that with the proper education and preparation many women neither need nor want medical interference while giving birth. Bradley classes have a large focus on prenatal nutrition and exercise to prepare for child birth. Additionally, a significant amount of class time is spent training the partner how to be a labor coach.

Hypnobirthing: According to Hypnobirthers, society has made women unnecessarily fearful and apprehensive of childbirth. Fear creates tension and produces adrenaline which increases pain which increases fear and tension which increases pain; not a good cycle to get into while in labor. Hypnobirth Classes teach students relaxation and self-hypnosis techniques including using relaxation music, incorporating visualizations, and light touch massage.

Hypnobabies: This is an independent, at-home class option for expectant parents. The program is similar to the Hypnobirthing in that you learn relaxation and self-hypnosis techniques. Where in Hypnobirthing the ideal state is non-moving and quiet, a Hypnobabies program will teach mom’s how to hypnotize themselves anywhere (even while peeing). The Hypnobabies class also teach mom’s hypnotic anesthesia techniques.

International Childbirth Education Association (ICEA): As a training program for child birth educators ICEA does not advocate a particular philosophy. Each instructor will have their own philosophy within the framework of advocating for natural child birth and parents having the ability to make informed decisions based on knowledge of alternatives.

LaMaze: LaMaze may be one of the most recognizable names in birth class options. (The one with all the breathing, right?) While controlled breathing is still one tool taught. LaMaze birth classes have expanded to teach many relaxation techniques. The goal of LaMaze is for women to increase their confidence in their ability to give birth.

[Editor's note: She didn't include my favorite method of "whatever happens happens" with a side of heavy epidural.]

Bri writes Habbala, for Stratejoy, and is expecting her first baby (a boy!) in November.  If she ran into you on the street, she would insist on buying you a cup of coffee so that the two of you could laugh, tell stories, and become great friends.

Today we have a guest post (I’m on vacation) from Kindercycle founder and first-time mama Jennifer Pesetsky.

Here is the birth we envisioned: We would labor at home. I would cook some kind of soup or stew, pet our cat and walk outside smelling the air, looking at the sky and touching the plants. Close to the actual time of birth, our three midwives would arrive and they would put cold cloths on my head, rub my back, and help me through the hardest contractions. Then, the baby would arrive in her own time and be greeted by my happy husband, our midwives, our meowing cat and me. She would be put onto my chest to snuggle or nurse, whatever she felt like. I would be filled with joy and happiness.

And, now, the reality.

Yes, we planned a homebirth despite objections from some family members and some friends. We loved our midwives and the wonderful pre-natal appointments with them where we talked about nutrition and listened for the baby’s heartbeat. They complimented my smooth skin and my firm abs. I looked forward to every appointment with them.

We had some hiccups along the pregnancy path. I was deemed “advanced maternal age,” and we had two miscarriages before this pregnancy. Because of my age, we got an early CVS test which the lab botched. Long story, but we got no results from that test and had to wait a month for an amnio and found out that all looked good. After that, it was pretty much smooth sailing except for my swollen hands which made writing and crafting entirely impossible.

Back to the birth itself.

Our baby was due sometime in late May or early June of 2010. In late April, we were planning a babymoon and a weekend getaway to celebrate my 39th birthday (I said advanced maternal age, right?) The night of April 26th, I went to sleep and dreamt of hot springs. Umm, no. It turned out to not be hot springs, but my water breaking and breaking and breaking. After a bit of panic and confusion (“It’s too early,” “What’s going on,” “I didn’t expect there to be so much water!”), we called our midwives who gently told us that we couldn’t have a home birth because we were at 35 weeks which was too early for a homebirth. The baby may have under-developed lungs or other complications which would require immediate hospital attention.

Feeling a bit shocked, we took showers (this was my husband’s idea which was a fabulous one), and packed bags for the hospital which we hadn’t done nor planned to do. We walked to the hospital (a 2-block walk), holding hands, carrying our birth ball and looking at the stars in the sky.

After some laboring in the triage cubicle, we found out that the baby was breach and we would need a c-section. After hours of passing time in the triage room, our baby was delivered by c-section at 10:41am on April 27th, 2010. She was taken out of me and taken away to get medical care. I don’t quite remember all these details because of a sleepless night and some really powerful drugs. She was 4 pounds 6 ounces and spent 9 days in the NICU. Other than her weight, she was a very healthy little girl.

Because we are Jewish, on her 8th day of life, we had a baby naming ceremony in the outdoor courtyard of the NICU with our Rabbi and our NICU nurse. We named her Star Malia; her Hebrew name is Kochava Malka – queen of the stars. Her names also have family significance; she is named after my husband’s great-aunt who raised my husband’s mother, and after my great-aunt who married a Holocaust survivor and they never had children.

Now she is a happy 14 month old. She is developmentally right on target, and tracks the bottom of the curve for height and weight. For a variety of reasons, we are not attempting a victory baby.

This is the story of Star’s birth, which I am finally learning to be proud of.

Thanks so much to Jennifer for sharing her story. She is the mom behind KinderCycle – www.KinderCycle.org – helping families get rid of kids’ stuff they are done with and get kids’ stuff they want.  She lives in Berkeley, California with her husband and 15 month old daughter.

Home birth can be a lovely option if you choose it and have the right support team — and upholstery cleaner in place — but that’s not what I want for myself. After my first labor and delivery, I don’t think I’m a good candidate anyway. I realize I never did tell you about my loooong first childbirth with my rookie baby, Holden. I do want to tell you someday — or at least write it down so I don’t forget — but it is so much less fun than wiping someone’s tushy, which is the promise of this site, I don’t know if I’ll ever get around to it.

Because of my most recent labor that was four hours long (including the waiting and relaxing associated with an epidural), I expect this next little guy to come QUICKLY.

At this point, I know a handful (yep five!) women who have had unplanned at-home childbirths and all I can say is that I’m terrified. Their stories are fascinating; unless, of course, you’re pregnant, in which case they’re terrifying.

On all fours in the bathroom while the paramedics are running a few minutes late and your toddler is sleeping. Wow.

In the living room chair while your husband is loading up the car for the hospital and he returns to get you to find the baby crowning… dang.

If I’m not giving you enough juicy details, check out Kristen’s home birth story.

Let me just say that feeling my baby’s head emerge while I’m still at home, a mere 3 miles from the hospital, is something I’d prefer to avoid.

So how should I prepare for the worst case scenario?

A kind soul over at our BabyCenter column suggested that I pick up an emergency childbirth handbook, just in case. Somewhere near the front door, I can stock clean towels, shoelaces, and whatever else I’m supposed to have (boiling water?!). I’ll make sure our tarps are within reach, not buried in the shed somewhere as the big day approaches.

This particular book comes highly recommended, but I’m not finding a hard copy. Maybe my husband should download the google ebook.

So, I’m open to all tips and advice, but please, no more home birth horror stories.

We’ve got a new column over at giggle GAB and are excited to share. Our giggle gig is called Parent Talk and it’s stuffed with tips and lessons learned for expectant new moms.

As I spent time on the giggle site during the process of getting to know the brand, I began coveting certain products, most of which weren’t around when I had my first two babies. I can’t help it. Although I dread lunchpacking on a daily basis, baby feeding gear lures me in with it’s promise of making food prep more fun. Am I right?

1. Bib clip. We use cloth napkins in my house, and this would allow me to use one for the baby, too. I’ll just clip it around his neck.
   
2. Owl lunch bag from Skip Hop. Insulated, adorable, practical, and a good deal. Whitney’s daughter carries this to preschool everyday.
   
3. Mash & serve bowl. The easy answer to making quick baby food mashes at home or a restaurant. Bash, smash, done. I bet my older boys will like to help with this job.
   
4. thinkbaby food storage system. BPA- and bad-stuff-free with bright orange bento styling.
   
5. Big splurge: BabyBjorn high chair is clean, safe, and collapses down to save space.

Do you have any of those things? Which ones are worth the money? (Oh, and giggle now has daily deals, too.)

This month, Whitney and I have three posts over on giggle GAB. Check them out:

On Rookie Motherhood (and what you won’t get at your baby shower!) A few observations about what’s cute vs. what’s practical. Yes, I get a little graphic here. But, how else will you know what these weird things are for?

Helping Hands: how to get the help you need (and want) in the early days. From her earliest memories of juggling well-meaning offers of help, Whitney shares what worked and what totally didn’t.

5 tips to survive the night shift. Yep, newborns are not like the rest of us. We have tips to optimize your late-night hours.

note: this post is part of relationship with giggle who pays us for our work on giggle GAB.

Around 25 weeks pregnant, the heartburn started with a vengeance. It usually flared up towards the end of the evening — right around when RookieDad Alec got home from work — and lasted until bedtime. Whine whine whine. Squirm. Complain. Wah.

I remember this symptom keenly from before. I once read that having a lot of heartburn meant your baby would be born with hair. When my second son was bald until about 18 months, I threw that theory out the window. This time around, rather than being a martyr waiting for a furry child, I did a lot of reading and research on the topic. I found a lot of websites willing to let me cut out my favorite foods. I also bought a big supply of regular strength Tums so I could pop them as needed.

Then I read the very best advice and tested it out! It was so awesome, I didn’t even want to blog about it for fear of jinxing my success. This amazing tip — Don’t drink during meals — allowed me to go one week with no heartburn and no Tums and still eating pretty much whatever I wanted. Sweet.

Not drinking was completely counter-intuitive to me because it seems like having lots and lots of water would dilute the acid and soothe the burn. Apparently, drinking with meals distends the stomach further and causes the nasty acids to reflux (or whatever it’s called, I’m pregnant, not a doctor!).

After eight days of great success, I got a little cocky. Last night, I drank a big glass of orange juice right before dinner. Misery.

So, I’m back on the wagon drinking lots of water between meals and letting myself getting a little thirsty while eating. Other advice I liked? Get calcium (AKA ice cream) and wear loose-fitting clothes.

Have you found any good solutions for heartburn pregnancy? I’m all ears (and throat).

[photo via 96dpi on flickr]

Heather looked so cute in her bold colors and pattern mash-up today, I forced her to pose for some photos.

This is what 26 weeks looks like.

Miss Heather says her current cravings are brownies, watermelon, and fresh pickles. Also? Going to bed early.

Side effects include heartburn and excessive weepiness.

The shirt is from Motherhood Maternity, the skirt is non-maternity from American Apparel, and the scarf is from Tea Collection and was a gift from them. (Did you know they have a Women’s collection?!)

P.S. The t-shirt material skirt is only $15 on Amazon right now and is good postpartum wear. I’ve got one, too.

Last summer — a few months before we decided to try for another baby — we cleared out the last of our baby gear. I donated 2 cribs, a toddler bed, a full maternity wardrobe, and a pile of strollers. Ahh, what a nice feeling to purge the closets and shed of unused stuff.

Until I got knocked up and totally need want all that stuff again. Wah.

Digging a little deeper into my storage nooks, I found few random odds and ends. So, here’s a short list of what I kept — even when I thought I gave it all away — and why:

1. Pack n play: I love the idea of little babies visiting with their tired parents so we can share dinner or the evening playing games. We kept the pack-n-play to give those visiting tiny people a place to rest. Times used for that purpose, zero.

Since we have not yet decided if we’re going to pony up for a real crib this time around, it may serve a big job as primary sleep place.

2. My brest friend: I kept this baby’s-first-month-lifesaver nestled in a closet on a hanger for more than six years. It was right between the bridesmaid dress I wore at Whitney’s wedding and a suit my mom had in the seventies. No wonder I never found it during the big cleanup. I’ll be happy to wear it around for a few weeks and then pass it on.

3. Dwarfland: This adorable playmat seemed to have such future potential for big kids and their little toy vehicles, but it was smooshed behind our living room chair so it never fulfilled that destiny. I’m looking forward to giving it a third life with a drooling-tummy-time-needing bambino.

4. Our fancy glider: Whitney might find them overrated, but I like the glider. I got it as a hand-me-down six years ago so the price was perfect. After its primary role in breastfeeding support, I enjoyed it for reading goodnight stories.  Just recently, we moved story time to the bunk beds when my sons got too wide and the books got too narrow for my arms.

5. Breast pump: The same awesome chick who gave me her glider gave me a second-hand Medela Pump in Style. Still in the shed. Need some new bottles and tubing and I’ll be good to go.

6. Snoogle: As one of my few big splurges for Pregnancy #2, I did not want to part with my comfy pregnancy pillow. The Snoogle kicks butt for getting in a decent sleep position (even if husbands HATE it). I loaned it out to Stefania when she was pregnant, and she returned it. Bless her.

Do you cling to any baby or maternity things even though you’re “totally done” just in case you aren’t? Or have you discovered any hidden treasures that you assumed were long gone?

Let me put my cards on the table: I’m out of boy names.

When Holden was still in utero, I had lots of great ideas. When Milo was baking, I had fewer great ideas. Now, I’m all tapped out.

As I look around our preschool, kindergarten class, and my extended circle of mom friends, I see a few wonderful names that might work perfectly. But am I allowed to use them?

There’s one in particular that I have my eye on. It fits most of my crazy self-imposed name rules: has two or three syllables; is uncommon but easy to say and spell; ends in an “N”, “R” or hard vowel sound; and would create decent initials. Without further research, I don’t yet know whether it is also the brand-name of a mediocre product in Australia and a literary name, but c’mon, you can’t have everything.

So, I’m trying to figure out if I can use it without violating a code of friendship.

Would you “steal” a friend’s baby’s name? Does it matter if they’re a close friend? Does it matter more if she’s an okay friend but your kids would cross paths (A LOT)? What if it’s a relative?

Has a friend ever “stolen” one of your favorite baby names? Did she ask you first? Were you flattered, angry, or totally indifferent?

May is Pregnancy Awareness month and while I am aware that every month is some special focus, from Autism to Zebra preservation, this one seems relevant to discuss here.

Founder Anna Getty, mother of two and author, has established Pregnancy Awareness month in order to help expectant mothers learn more about nutrition and their bodies. Learn more at the official website.

Los Angeles readers, there is a fabulous Pregnancy Awareness Month event for pregnant and new moms on Sunday, May 1 in Santa Monica.

For those of you who became parents via pregnancy, what is the most important thing you think mothers-to-be need to know? (Anything goes!)

(I am 36 weeks pregnant in the above photo.)

After acknowledging that “morning sickness” is a stupid name for a condition that leaves pregnant women hurling in the bathroom sink or behind gas stations during any hour of the day, let’s talk about battling it.

I kept a pack of strong peppermint gum with me All The Time and ate every two hours, usually cereal, until the first 14 weeks of this third pregnancy were over. Between the naps and constant snacking, I felt like a toddler. I still hurled a dozen times. Yes, I counted!

My temporary best friend, only failed me once

I asked the twitter community (twitterverse, I believe we like to be called) for their favorite remedies for those queasy first trimester feelings and got a gaggle of great answers. After enough people said saltines and ginger ale to make me barf, I got a few clever responses. Sorry folks. Are puke jokes funny or not really?

Sweet stuff

• Mmartin4688: suck on Skittles!!!
• just_ough: vanilla ice cream
• Gazerella: smoothies got me through it!
• NHoltwick: McDonalds regular coke. Seriously works!!
• Teondrab: I found that sweet sucking candy and fruit juice, things with sugar helped to ease nausea.
• themobilemama: jolly ranchers helped me get through the work day
• TuesdayGirl: all that worked for me during my last pregnancy was swedish fish.
• injuryboard: My favorite was sucking on Gatorade ice cubes. Preggie Pops are also good.
• erinlong: Cold, bubbly Coke. Dr said I could safely have a few a day! And chew gum!
• LouandBunny: Eat a few cookies before even getting out of bed! Works a treat!

Missy Martin's trusted pal

Salty and strange

• SusanW: Salt and vinegar potato chips totally took care of me. I ate a handful after every meal. Including breakfast. (Eeew.)

Susan Wagner's old friend

More tips, tricks, and odd foods

• leeleepitts: Don’t get hungry, don’t get full. [Heather note: best tip ever]
• CourtKlingbeil: I took everything! Dramamine 2 Zofran. Was sick from 6 wks til the end Medicine is totally worth it if u need it to function.
• madatmama: Seabands. That was the only thing that worked.
• WCopley: Citrus helped me — lemonade, marmalade, lemon drops.
• beingthefunmama: amen to the citrus. Frozen lemonade was also on my short list of ok foods &7-11 hot dogs (i’d prefer to forget those!)
• LavenderPoet: Have something next to the bed so you can have a couple bites before getting up. Cereal or saltines.
• jennathornton3: ginger ale, saltines, coke or anything bubbly…cold things, lemon and of course good ol phenergan
• Debutots_Jen: Yuck, don’t remind me. How about: Try and sleep through those awful 12 weeks. Actually, acupuncture really helped with my 3rd
• DeaCasebeer: take your prenatal vitamins at night & peppermint tea from Starbucks. That is what helped me.
• thewarriormom: I had 5 full term pregnancies. Tea w/ raw ginger root & strong peppermint gum helped a lot.
• leeleepitts: I second peppermint gum. Also, Mac and cheese. It was all I could stomach for about 3 wks.
• beingthefunmama: My cure: eggs w salsa. They were 1 of the few things I could manage (ended up on Zofran for nausea). Protein made huge diff.
• mkmaines: Zofran!
• BabyBumpBeyond: What worked best for me was never allowing my stomach to be empty- lots of healthy snacks! For me, eating plain/dull foods made morning sickness worse! (which makes it 10x harder when u are #glutenfree & pregnant)
• mayberrymom: acupressure wristbands (Sea Bands)
• caglove: Crystallized ginger candy, soda crackers on the bedside table and patience. Good luck!
• PamperedChef_: Anything with peppermint or ginger, like Canada Dry ginger ale helped relieve the nausea. I drank lots of mint tea.
• jolenemarie: Soda crackers, in bed, before rising!
• cookiecreambaby: I took ginger supplement capsules in the morning and then ate saltines with raspberry ginger ale.
• iamti2ger: deep breathing exercises and chocolate lol [Heather note: sadly, I've been avoiding chocolate because I don't want to develop an aversion. Chocolate cake, however, is still fine]
• MissyMuzz : I have a palatable cereal delivered to me in bed it works a treat raises blood sugars enough and gives me a little energy. also a small snack when you go for ur pre dawn 4am pee works wonders.

So, what, if anything worked for you?

ps I learned that you can actually subscribe to cereal from Amazon and other foods to deliver certain quantities monthly (get a 6-pack every month and its a deal). If you’re going through it like I was, it’s a worthwhile option.

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This post was totally not sponsored, but if you click through to the amazon links, we may get a few cents. Thanks and feel better!