I read that zinger from an interview with Danielle Smith and it really stuck with me. As a near-obsessive Yes-Sayer, I need some reminders about when and how (and even why!) to say no to life’s little requests.

Danielle says, “Your time is precious. Value it. Make it a ‘Hell Yeah.’” Read the whole article at 3thingsformom.com.

So, What is 3 Things for Mom?

In January, when I was still busy saying yes to most things, I participated in the launch of a terrific web project; Lauren several writers the same simple assignment: Please share a truth, a tip, and a find. She wanted to create an archive of inspiration to be enjoyed over morning coffee (or whenever you find your sneaky moments, thank you naptime!)

Each time I go back and visit, I find more rich advice and perspective. I dare you not to get lost in these words of wisdom: 3thingsformom.com/contributors

Tell me which things resonate most with you today.

The best things in life are free, guys, right? That includes making a baby*, and if you insist, you can give birth to that baby for free in your backyard or bed. But then what?

I asked our Facebook community of more than 10,000 moms what they found most useful — so useful they’d share it with a friend who had a new baby — and while many named products to buy, like the Nosefrida Snotsucker, or books to buy, like these, many shared resources for free advice.

Here’s what you smart moms wanted to share with the rookies:

1. How to make your own Moby wrap
   
   
2. Follow @nancyholtzman on twitter. She answers all questions at all hours!
3. “Always take the baby’s socks off when changing a messy diaper.” Good one.
4. Subscribe to Lucie’s List, the lowdown on everything from pregnancy, birth, carseats, and life after baby.
5. “Have a lactation consultant come to your house as soon as you get home from the hospital (better yet, have one you’ve interviewed come to the hospital) because the ones there are crap.”
6. Cloth diapering resource Padded Tush Stats 
7. Dr. Sears’ website 
8. AskMoxie.org, for compassionate parenting advice and a wonderfully nonjudgmental group of readers/ commenters.
9. Hygiea Kate, the founder of Hygiea breastpumps, also offers support on Twitter.

*I want to acknowledge that some of us have to invest boatloads of money into making a baby and I am truly sorry for that. It’s not fair. The end.

I’m a list-maker and a score-keeper; sometimes it’s all I can do to NOT literally track everything I do that is measurable. I have learned over time, for example, that it is really really best not to count who changes how many diapers in a marriage. But for good habits, it is nice to see progress on a chart, whether we’re talking about toddlers learning how to use the potty or mamas needing someone to throw a parade because we laced up our collective running shoes and logged a few miles — I get it!

I started using the Lift iPhone app, a community goal tracking tool, about a week ago to give myself big green checkmarks for reaching my daily goals. It looks like this:

To take it one giant step further, Whitney and I started a group for supporting each other rookie-moms-style. We want to create habits together that help new moms do activities and be social… and have more fun! Using the Lift community features, we can all cheer each other on. If the day is a total mess, you’ll have us giving you props no matter what. Our collective goals are these:

1. Take your baby on an outing (maybe one of our Rookie Moms challenges)
2. Connect with a friend (new or old, we don’t care)
3. Treat yourself in a little or big way (bite of chocolate or legitimate self-care, up to you)
4. Find something to be thankful for (a baby’s giggle or a partner who changes diapers, whatev)

Lift is also available on your web browser (if you join the Rookie Moms group at lift.do/groups/rookie-moms) to help you get started building healthy habits.

While you’re on Lift, you’ll find other habits you might want to try, go ahead.

Whitney said that she wants a gold star every time she makes dinner. Now she can give herself one.

Some other good actions to check off each day: Do something nice for my partner, Smile at my children, Go someplace new. Since you can make up your own, you’re only limited by your imagination.

I’m experimenting with a few myself and think I’ve gone too far.

Yes, THINK about getting to Inbox Zero is one of my current habits. I check that one off when I don’t DO the Inbox Zero steps. Ummm, what?!

Now that you know what it is, join us at lift.do/groups/rookie-moms

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Free to use. Not sponsored, just fun and helpful, we hope!

When I was a kid I spent hours and hours traveling between my mom’s house and my dad’s house. They lived 200 miles apart, which meant that every school vacation and 3-day weekend began and ended with a four-hour car ride for me, from age 4 until about 14 when I started having my own social life. I had no iPad to get lost in. Borrriiiiiing.

Now I have long-car-ride-phobia. The four-hour drive to my dad’s house feels like a full day’s work. And I don’t even drive — my husband does it.

Road trips are not really the same as plain old waiting. I’m not sure which is more anxiety-producing for parents of young children. You’ll have to tell me what you think.

Let’s say you’re boarding a long plane fight with your children. You’re armed with an iPad and headphones and a crapload of snacks. After getting situated with your carry-on stowed properly and seatbelts fastened, you’ve been told that all electronic devices must be turned off. Fine, you expected that. But suddenly, the wait on the runway has been extended. In just forty-five minutes you’ll be in flight. FORTY FIVE MINUTES sitting next to someone who does not care to page through the airline magazine or just lean back and close her eyes.

Here’s when you need a piece of paper, a pen, and a good imagination.

I was asked to comment on activities to help make a long wait fun — a topic that we included in Stuff Every Mom Should Know — and here’s what I said:

What games do you play to pass the time?

P.S. Sorry about the ad below the video player. I can’t make it go away! It appears to be attached to the player.

For more parenting videos like this one, check out Kids in the House.

Tide, Bounce, and Downy have offered to sponsor this post in the spirit of “things that go together.”

Keeping in mind Heather’s translation of clothing tags that say “Dry Clean Only” to mean “Don’t Buy Me”, we have five ideas for machine washable outfits to wear to a baby shower when you’re the…

1- Friend who just had her own baby: Nursing tank + Cardigan + Floral Skirt = Cute, full coverage outfit, that enables nursing at a party

2- Sister-in-law who doesn’t do dresses — or baby showers: Tshirt + Statement necklace + Black jeans = I might be wearing a t-shirt, but I’m still here for you!

3- Older sister… but not that old: Day dress + Western-ish boots = Fun, quirky aka my kids are old enough that I’ve gotten my sense of style back. P.S. I am showing Heather’s glasses with this because she gets boatloads of compliments on these glasses wherever she goes — and she and I are the older sisters of babymakers these days.

4- Pregnant cousin: Maternity tunic + Leggings = I’m cute, but polite; I’m not going to show up the guest of honor. (flat sandals and yellow handbag, too!)

5- Friend with twin toddlers who barely made it out of the house: Shirtdress + Bright belt = I have mastered an easy uniform to wear when I’m kid-free.

Thanks to Tide, Downy, and Bounce sponsoring this post and for inspiring me to take some time to make sure my clothing picks are all machine washable. One more thing that goes well together? These guys!

With Tide®, Downy® and Bounce®, you can keep your summer fashions looking new up to 50% longer.* Text CLEAN to TARGET (827438) for mobile coupons.

*vs. leading value detergent alone

Foam noodles are lovely in the pool for kids who are close enough to swimming to use them safely. Older kids can whack them around like light sabers. But did you know that the smart people of the Internet have identified a quadrillion more things to do with pool noodles?

Here’s a sampling.

1- Prevent a child from falling off her bed. I read this on ParentHacks years ago and have seen it a few other places since then. Tuck a pool noodle under the fitted sheet on the outer edge of the bed to create a border your child is less likely to roll over.

2- Slice them up to create oversized confetti.

I used regular scissors to cut these. It’s hard work for your hands, so recruit your partner to help you work on this after bedtime.

A bathtub or kiddie pool full of pool noodle chunks is almost as fun as a ball pit at Chuck E Cheese. And certainly less infectious.

source

These same slices can be used as mega-beads for educational purposes or party decorations. There is a tutorial for this pretty pool noodle garland at sugar and cloth.

3- Create an outdoor game. I saw this javelin set up on Parents.com and suspect that it’s not a realistic project for any family. I can just imagine myself sweating and swearing as I attempt to balance these things just right, when a light wind comes along and changes the whole game.

source

I did test out this Parents.com tip: Stick chopsticks into the grass and slide your foam noodle on top.

It worked wonderfully. (Note to self: Steal extra chopsticks from sushi counter at grocery store.) The ones I used in this picture are fancy and not appropriate for stabbing into the dirt.

4- Babyproof anything. From the sharp edges of a coffee table to the edge of a crib that baby keeps chewing on. An impressive tutorial for no-sew fabric-plus-pool-noodle crib rail cover is here. Note that you don’t want to expose the foam where it might be chewed on and become a choking hazard, hence the slipcover.

The foam noodle I put on my sharp TV console is very snug, but the truth is a determined 2-year old could take it off. I think it’s a great, quick fix for a visit to Grandma’s house or for a new walker who literally spends the whole day falling into furniture. I don’t think a 15-month old could mess with this, beyond taking a bite out of it.

5- Make a marble track. Split one water noodle in half and let the kids have a race. This photo comes from a blogger who got the idea from Family Fun magazine. I love it!

Note: Marbles are not for toddlers. You already know that, right?

6- Design a seasonal wreath. If you asked me 10 years ago if I would like to make a seasonal wreath for my door, I would have told you that I certainly would not. But I’ve gone over to the dark side — or shall I say the Better Homes and Garden’s side? My kids love decorating for holidays and I will try not to have a complete identity crisis if I find myself making a red, white, and blue “pool noodle wreath” in July.

source

7- Make lightsabers, for real. Well, for pretend for real. Start with a pool noodle, then add silver duct tape and create a control panel-inspired design on the handle with black tape. This looks really cute for a big kid’s birthday party, but I’m not sure I want to stick around for the ensuing activity it may inspire among the party guests. Someone is definitely going to cry, and it will probably be my kid. Maybe hand it out when they head out the door?

source (this post has good instructions)

Want to see more? Follow us on Pinterest. I’ll keep pinning pool noodle hacks as I find them!

Hello there to our readers who are fathers or have them in their lives. This one’s for you.

Down the street from me lives parenting author Jeremy Adam Smith. Our sons mix it up in the same second grade and we’ve become playdate pals by association. In fact, his son’s legs are on the real balance board I showed you last week.

Jeremy recently wrote about the ten secrets to being a happy working father based on his academic/scientific research and personal experience, and I wanted to share it with you.

Here’s an excerpt from How to be a Happy Working Dad, Part One:

1. Find yourself a family-friendly workplace—and decide how much money that’s worth to you.
When I was weighing this job against another that paid more money, I actually monetized that flexibility. How much was I willing to pay for the ability to pick up my son from school, take him to the dentist, bring him by the office? My answer was $5,000 a year. In other words, that’s the amount I was willing and able to sacrifice to be the working father I wanted to be.

{read more}

And one from Part Two:

10. Make your choices and own the consequences.

Most grown-ups understand that you can’t “have it all”—you have to decide what’s most important to your family and then make the necessary trade-offs. It could fall to you to support a partner and children, in which case you’re just not going to make every soccer game. You could also end up becoming the primary caregiver—which will sidetrack your career. In a world of choices, it’s inevitable for us to be haunted by the roads we didn’t take.

The trick is to love the one we’re walking—and keep going. But accepting your own choices isn’t enough: It’s also critical for you to accept your partner’s choices, and for your partner to be content with yours. That’s no magic formula for making that happen—just a constant process of communication, negotiation, and empathy.

{read more}

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Jeremy Adam Smith is Web Editor of the Greater Good Science Center and a 2013 fellow with the Institute for Justice and Journalism. He is also the author or co-editor of four books, including The Daddy Shift, Rad Dad, and The Compassionate Instinct. You can also follow him on Twitter or see him in my neighborhood on a bike!

This is the second post in our series sponsored by Annie’s Homegrown.

When Julian started playing soccer, I suddenly understood why fast food is so dang popular with families in America. Working parents and afterschool activities combine in a way that makes the dinner production incredibly challenging. Now Scarlett is in gymnastics and Julian has a baseball schedule that makes walking in the door at 6 pm a frequent occurrence for us. Hence, I have my eyes wide open for fast and easy dinners that don’t include a side of fries. My kids won’t eat burgers anyway, so even if I drove by an In N Out on the way home from one of their sporting events, I’d be the only one who ordered something. (Seriously, what did I do wrong?)

Enter Pizza Night.

We do enjoy pizza as a family at many of our local, fancy pizza restaurants. Plain for the kids; potato, pesto, and pancetta for the adults. Something like that. But more often than not, we just want to get home, get them in the bath, and ready for bed. Often, I feel I deserve take out and don’t want to worry about how to make Indian or Thai food work for my picky eater. That’s when I look to the freezer.

It’s not June Cleaver-approved, but it makes me totally happy to have grown up take-out for the adults and Annie’s Frozen Pizza for the kids. That’s right, June. I make two separate meals. Actually I don’t even make them: I order one and heat up the other. It’s called modern family life. Get to know it.

This rising crust pizza bakes up in my beloved supersized toaster oven while I get out drinks and utensils and yell at people who need to take their cleats off before they come in the house. The crust is whole wheat and the cheese is made from milk that’s 100% hormone free. That is to say, it’s quality ingredients without any work on my part. Raw carrots and apple slices on the side and I’m done.

I’m a barbecue chicken pizza lover myself, but no one in my house will agree to that, so it’s Four Cheese for them.

Don’t miss Heather’s great lessons on easy roasted vegetables and other sides that make Pizza Night even healthier.

Thanks to Annie’s Homegrown for sponsoring this post — and if you’re hot to stock your freezer for easy dinners, click over to download a $1.50 coupon from them.

I struggle with figuring out what to wear. Before kids, I didn’t know. And ten years after buying this What Not to Wear book (and gestating three humans) I sure don’t know any better.

So, I’m on a quest to figure out my style along with realistic, affordable ways to get there without shopping. And then I found this blog: My Year of Fabulous!

Wow! Holly is a girl after my own heart and totally doing something about it. After having her three children, she grew tired of dressing like a meth addict every day and came up with a plan (a kind of nutty “one activity for every year of your baby’s first life” kind of plan, but that’s why I love it!).

Each month, she’s going full-force into a new style. This month, she’s knee-deep in American Classic wearing the styles of the preppy and the presidential. January was sexy tough Rock n Roll, February was eclectic Euro Chic, March was Mod, and April was Bohemian. And we don’t know what’s next!

She’s got photos of her different outfits and reflections on how they make her feel. She’s having fun but keeping the goal in mind. And ps she lives on a FARM.

How does she keep it affordable? Read her secret to letting her $500 clothing budget last all year.

I discovered My Year of Fabulous from Ain’t No Mom Jeans.

This post about cleaning up life’s messes was sponsored by Huggies.

In 2005, I purchased a refillable tub of Huggies baby wipes that I still use. Last week, I intended to purchase the latest formulation of Huggies Wipes (the ones with NEW Triple Clean action) but instead, I bought EIGHT NEW TUBS! Holy cats, sometimes online shopping really is too confusing for me.

In all likelihood, I will donate the bonus tubs to Help a Mother Out to help needy baby bums, but part of me was at least a little excited to plop the tubs in every room in my house (and car!) so I’ll never be more than 10 feet from clean hands and faces.

{Cue the evil genius music}

These are the boys I live with:

When I first became a mom, I thought that wipes were just for cleaning butts, but now that my kids bring home a series of little messes, I think we’ll have some active containers long after the diaper days are over.

These are the messes I typically tackle with wipes:

• FOOD: yogurt goatee, buttery fingers, “I do it myself” applesauce in the hair
• Bodily fluids: Diaper stuff, eye gunk, and super snotty noses
• Outside dirt: garden variety black fingernail stuff
• Paint: finger paint, face paint, spray paint, you name it!

I keep wipes tubs in the kitchen, nursery and minivan. I subscribe to a steady supply of wipes refills so I never run out.

Last month, Milo and some buddies turned a lovely backyard birthday party into a mud-pit in a matter of minutes. What the?? He needed the hose (see above) and then still had to come home naked wrapped in a blanket. His clothes required some aggressive hosing and they were also saved. Of course, some messes are too big for wipes alone, but I was happy to have them after touching this kid and squeezing him into my car!

Do you have any creative uses for baby wipes?

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This post was sponsored by Huggies. All experiences and opinions are my own. They meant to send me a new tub of wipes for testing but I accidentally ordered eight. Win win, I say.

Huggies Natural Care® Wipes with NEW Triple Clean* layers are gentle on baby’s skin and thick enough to clean. Interested in trying out this new product for yourself? You can become an Official Huggies® Tester at Huggies.com/Tester.

For coupons and rewards, visit the Huggies® Test Town! Or check out the Huggies® Facebook fan page to learn more.

I ran into this little one (third daughter from beloved atmosphere blog) on the veranda at the Mom2 summit. She’s three months old today and celebrating her special day by sleeping in the arms of anyone interested in holding her. I couldn’t resist photographing her contemplative pose and massive diaper bulge. Teeny tiny everything.

Her mama went to junior high and high school with me in Ohio.

This is sort of advertise-y, but I love sending cards with my kids’ pictures on them. I’ve used Treat.com to send sympathy cards, birthday cards, and thank you cards throughout the year. I’m simply a huge procrastinator when it comes to getting something in the mail, but somehow ordering online helps me get it done. True, my signature is not on there in ink, but the card gets sent, and that’s a win.

Case in point: There is currently a Hallmark card on my coffee table, half-written to my childhood friend whose father passed away. It’s been there for three weeks. I couldn’t find the words to finish and I’m going to see her at his memorial this weekend before the card goes out.

On a happier note: After my parents take us on a vacation, I usually send them a thank you card made from a photo taken on the vacation.

Mother’s Day is almost here.

Whether you’re looking for a card for your mom, grandmother, sisters, or in-laws, you can have have 100% control of the content. They have 450+ Mother’s Day designs to choose from, ranging from funny to sentimental.  Add your own pictures and text to make them your style.

(25% off all Mother’s Day orders by using the code TREATMOM25 before midnight on April 30. )