When I was about to have my rookie baby, Holden, I looked at my friend Susan (going at it for the second time) as though she were a total expert. I thought that I was sooooo special (not true!) and sooooo clueless (true!) and that she had it all figured out.
Well, I have news for my four years-ago self and any of you rookie parents: it’s true that a second-time around mom may be more comfortable with the new baby, but she’s still living on the frontier of how to deal with her older child PLUS she’s got two to juggle and even less time for a nap. So, it’s still kinda a big deal.
If you have any friends about to have second babies and you’re wondering what to get the mom who already has all the baby gear, allow us to make a few suggestions:
- Private Yoga class: prenatal or post-partum yoga where she doesn’t have to figure out how to leave the house = awesome.
- Food train. Enlist a gang of friends to sign up for meals on a calendar. Witching hour times two is no time for cooking.
- Advice book: interview your friends with more than one kid about little and big things. How do you load everyone into the car? How do you get food on the table? What is something you swore you’d never do (that you now probably do)? Useful or not, these are great little keepsakes.
- Forgo the shower and chip in for a massage
- Meal Prep party where mama gets freezer fodder from everyone; there are places (like mygirlfriendskitchen) that can organize this for you.
- Everyone gets a massage
- If different gender, clothes
- If same gender: a fresh towel, wash cloths, onesies that are unstained
- If name known, personalized clothes so that #2 has a few things of his own
- Babysitting dates where other moms of same aged #1 will come get #1 and take him away for a couple hours
- The basics, be the sweetie that buys a full medicine cabinet’s worth of infant tylenol and butt zinc. More excellent gift ideas for new parents on our amazing registry tips.
What are some other great ideas for moms going again for their second, third, or fourth?
psssst. Hey Whit,
You had a “real shower” and it looked like fun. did you like it? Did you wish you had a group massage instead? Shhhh… I won’t tell.
Gotta have a baby carrier! (a wrap of course, so you can run around after the other kids). This way your other kid(s) don’t feel like the baby is a burden
How about chipping in for a double stroller? I like the Uppa Baby Vista or the Phil & Ted’s. Theses are pricey–so it makes a great group gift.
Get a custom made pregnant lady cake topper for the cake! They are made of polymer clay and designed to match the characteristics of the mom and her children. http://www.flickr.com/photos/kellysclaycreations/3470574997/in/set-72157615050279099/
so cute!
I just hosted a co-ed shower for second time parents. Wish I’d seen this posting before I planned it for practicality’s sake, but we had a great time just being adults and enjoying sushi and sake…sometimes that’s needed, too! http://cassylee.wordpress.com/2009/06/08/how-to-plan-a-sushi-baby-shower/
So what advice do you have for moms pregnant with #3?!?
My Mom threw me a “necessities” shower. Like diapers, wipes, baby bath, lotion, diaper cream, etc. Just stuff the next one would need especially since we were having another boy. We also got gift cards so we could get the double stroller we wanted. It was GREAT!
For my 2nd shower, we just had a big party co-ed style! It was great just being surrounded by our friends. The gifts weren’t themed, but clothes and diapers were needed and received.
I think all babies should get a shower, even if it’s small! If I had another I love the idea of taking my girlfriends to the spa for a nice relaxing day before #3 arrives.
You could celebrate with a Mother Blessing, where you read meaningful things in a circle and bestow well wishes on the mother. It’s really nice.
She could also have a Diapers and Dinners party where you bring diapers in all sizes or a frozen entree